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"It just needs a tune up...": Bike shop shares rust-ridden "tetanus express" that no amount of WD-40 could cure; Jeremy Vine engages stealth mode; Groundhog Day GPS art; Hedge cutting "a danger to cyclists", council warns + more on the live blog

Dan Alexander is back in the live blog chair this Thursday, with all your essential, but mostly non-essential, updates from the cycling world
Thu, Feb 02, 2023 09:02
33
"It just needs a tune up...": Bike shop shares rust-ridden "tetanus express" that no amount of WD-40 could cure; Jeremy Vine engages stealth mode; Groundhog Day GPS art; Hedge cutting "a danger to cyclists", council warns + more on the live blogRusty bike (@trench_tales/Instagram)
02 February 2023, 08:48
"It just needs a tune up...": Bike shop shares the rust-ridden "tetanus express" that no amount of WD-40 could cure

As far as exciting names go, the "tetanus express" isn't the most appealing for casual weekend spin. Also, as per a quick Google search, the ol' tetanus/rust connection is apparently a bit of a myth, but hey, it's a fun name, let's not let the science get in the way of a good time...

As a long since departed Instagram user, checking Trench Tales' brilliant documentation of life in a bike shop periodically for live blog crackers is just about it for that particular app. But if there was one account likely to keep me coming back, it's them. Well worth a follow if you like your mechanical mishaps messy and just generally want to feel slightly better about the state you keep your pride and joy in.

Despite the bicycle abuse on show in every post, it's really hard to look away...remember these?

Worn tyre (@trench_tales/Instagram)

> Is there any rubber left? The impossibly worn tyre that earned bike shop visitor a standing ovation from mechanics... after he only came in "for a tube"

Cleat disaster (Image credit: @trench_tales/Instagram)

> Can it be real? Mechanic shares double cleat horror set up 

Yep, two Trench Tales classics. Anyway, today's caused the page's growing following the usual disbelief and amusement at what a mechanic is meant to do when an expectant customer arrives with THAT in tow...

One speculated the line delivered was: "IT JUST NEEDS A TUNE UP. I USED TO WORK IN A SHOP"

Another that it was just in for a "flat repair and rear brake adjustment. Only."

Someone else asked if it had been salvaged from the Titanic. Well played...

02 February 2023, 16:49
Giulio Ciccone wins another bike race — and throws his shades away AGAIN

Remember Ciccone's 2019 Giro win? Okay, fair enough maybe you're not as nerdy as us. The one where he beat Jan Hirt in the sprint and lobbed his glasses away in excitement...

He's done it again...

And if you want the blue bird app summed up in two embeds, here you go...

Seems there's only one way to decide this...

Polls

02 February 2023, 16:37
"If I'm shoplifting, is it the shop owners responsibility to have adequate security?": Village police force's much-criticised response to another bike theft

Unsurprisingly the have a pop at victims approach to tackling crime didn't go down spectacularly well...

02 February 2023, 15:28
Stage cancelled
02 February 2023, 15:07
Crash chaos neutralises Étoile de Bessèges stage two

Holy moly that's a big crash...

The stage has been neutralised while the race staff, doctors and riders pick through the pile of bikes and bodies. Let's hope everyone is as well as they can be after a pile up like that. 

We'll bring you more details as we get them here on the live blog... 

02 February 2023, 15:03
Why Are UK Bike Prices So High!? Is Brexit to Blame?

02 February 2023, 14:54
02 February 2023, 13:53
Ruben Guerreiro claims first win for Movistar, coming out on top on Saudi Tour queen stage

Ignore the flat finish, there was a tough ol' climb to the plateau at the top where Davide Formolo, Santiago Buitrago, Felix Großschartner and Ruben Guerreiro did battle for the stage win and control of the race.

As you've probably gathered, Guerreiro got the victory, his first for Movistar and leads Formolo by eight seconds on GC.

Not sure much more needs to be said, it's Saudi Tour after all...

02 February 2023, 13:27
"As long as the wheel goes around when I pedal" and more of your maintenance philosophies

Patrick9-32: "As someone who has four bikes, three of which currently have punctures I haven't got round to fixing yet, I don't appreciate the poor maintenance shaming." You're welcome, Patrick. If it's any consolation, I've only got one but still haven't got everything under control. Give me some sunshine for motivation...

JustTryingToGet...: "If it makes you feel better, I rarely bother sorting mine now unless it's urgent, I wait for issues to accumulate and then get the whole thing sorted... I'm so lazy someone comes to my house to collect the bike! I quite like this maintenance shaming as I've never let a bike get that bad!"

Global Nomad's got a simpler outlook on maintenance... "As long as the wheel goes around when I pedal."

02 February 2023, 13:26
02 February 2023, 13:15
Ethan Hayter to miss European Track Championships and other early season targets due to fractured collarbone
Ethan Hayter Tour Down Under 2023 (SWPix.com/Zack Whitehead)

[📷: SWPix.com/Zack Whitehead]

Ethan Hayter has undergone successful surgery in Australia for a fractured collarbone sustained at last weekend's Cadel Evans Great Ocean Road Race. The talented young Brit will now travel home but will not be competing at next week's European Track Championships in Switzerland, Ineos Grenadiers confirmed to Cyclingnews.

The 24-year-old's wins have been getting steadily bigger during his WorldTour career. Last year he added a British national TT championship and the Tour of Poland to his growing palmares and finished fourth in the World Championships TT.

02 February 2023, 12:16
Hedge cutting "a danger to cyclists", council warns

Potholes, dangerous driving, broken glass, ice, dodgy infrastructure, invisible dog leads etc. etc. you've heard almost just about every possible danger to people riding bicycles — until now...

Well, according to the East Anglian Daily Times concerns have been raised about the cutting back of a Suffolk hedgerow that may be endangering cyclists and damaging valuable habitat for wildlife.

The worry is the cut hedge in Goldings Lane may cause punctures and increase the debris along the route.

However, nobody seems to know why the hedge was trimmed, with residents and the council unsure of the culprit. Not sure the BBC will be after a six-part mystery crime drama, but still, frustrating for those involved...

"It appears to be a mystery. Whether it is tidying up in terms of hedge trimming or whether there are any plans for that site. There is certainly nothing that the town council is aware of," Cllr John Last said.

02 February 2023, 11:19
Groundhog Day GPS art
02 February 2023, 11:16
What happens on team training camp... goes on social media

Admittedly probably the most sober a British male forced to do a swimming pool forfeit at a hotel by the beach in Spain has ever been... 

02 February 2023, 11:06
Jeremy Vine engages stealth mode

Don't tell Jo about this...

> Opinion: No, I don't wave at other cyclists when I'm out for a ride... isn't a simple nod of acknowledgement enough? 

Anyway, cyclists recording law-breaking road users has been a hot topic this past week, with an Edinburgh rider who caught 12 drivers in one hour subsequently deactivating his social media accounts due to abuse. Well, we spoke to Mikey about the issue and he told us "people need to see justice being done" and the abuse only comes because some motorists "feel they have the right to drive how they want".

The full interview can be read here...

02 February 2023, 09:44
"Bit of T-cut & that'll be as good as new..."
Dan Alexander

Dan is the road.cc news editor and has spent the past four years writing stories and features, as well as (hopefully) keeping you entertained on the live blog. Having previously written about nearly every other sport under the sun for the Express, and the weird and wonderful world of non-league football for the Non-League Paper, Dan joined road.cc in 2020. Come the weekend you'll find him labouring up a hill, probably with a mouth full of jelly babies, or making a bonk-induced trip to a south of England petrol station... in search of more jelly babies.

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33 comments

Avatar
geomannie 531 | 1 year ago
5 likes

And this chain came through our bike recycling centre attached to a beautiful old Bob Jackson that had been left in the damp for years. We got the bike scrubbed up at last but some effort.

Avatar
Hirsute | 1 year ago
3 likes

Hedge cutting "a danger to cyclists", council warns

Paging Awavey - oh, I think they are still walking home.

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perce | 1 year ago
9 likes

I see the song Delilah has been banned from international rugby matches in Wales. Why? Why?

Avatar
hawkinspeter replied to perce | 1 year ago
9 likes

perce wrote:

I see the song Delilah has been banned from international rugby matches in Wales. Why? Why?

I used to have daydreams that I was Tom Jones and having underwear thrown at me. I saw a doctor about it and they said that it's not unusual.

Avatar
Rendel Harris replied to hawkinspeter | 1 year ago
8 likes

Sounds as if you were smoking the green green grass of home?

Avatar
hawkinspeter replied to Rendel Harris | 1 year ago
8 likes

Rendel Harris wrote:

Sounds as if you were smoking the green green grass of home?

It's better than burning down the house

Avatar
iandusud replied to hawkinspeter | 1 year ago
1 like

A man goes to the doctor and say "I keep thinking that I'm Tom Jones". The doctor replies "It's not unusual", to which the man replies, "Why, why, why?". 

Avatar
IanMSpencer replied to perce | 1 year ago
5 likes

It hasn't been banned, but somewhere along the line they thought singing a happy song about infidelity, stalking and murder probably wasn't very 21st century. It's alright though, he got his comeuppance in Green Green Grass (got hung).

Meanwhile, Knock 3 Times, (stalking and harassment) and Tie a Yellow Ribbon (locked up for unspecified crime which should not be profiting from).

If I Fell - The Beatles hope the ex will cry when the singer goes off with the new girl.

Most 50s songs seem to be bloke stalking an ex-girlfriend trying to get her back once she realises the error of her ways or girls being grateful for boyfriend coming back after playing around for a while.

Best not to know, just whistle.

Avatar
AlsoSomniloquism replied to IanMSpencer | 1 year ago
2 likes

In that category you can add "Baby it's cold outside" - Man keeping woman in the house against her will so they have sex.

Then obviously later decades you have the songs about taking drugs or potential suicide (comfortably numb could go in either for example). 

Myself, I'm abit like the old advert for dodgy music tapes. The music is the main thing and the lyrics just go how I think I heard them. My favorite two for that are "my ears are alight" and "Reverend Bluejeans."

 

Avatar
Flintshire Boy replied to AlsoSomniloquism | 1 year ago
1 like

.

Good one. Used to think Bruce on BTR was singing 'you and me on the streets at night never less than pissed'.

.

Correct words, of course, are 'ever-lasting kiss'.

.

Avatar
brooksby | 1 year ago
1 like

Landowner blocks plans for green walkway through Sussex estate

Sir Richard Kleinwort has not given permission for viable walking and cycling route between Burgess Hill and Haywards Heath

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2023/feb/02/landowner-blocks-pla...

Quote:

Anne Eves, a local councillor, said that because of the estate’s refusal to help with the path “everything has ground to a halt”, with all 16 routes either blocked by the estate or deemed unsuitable for development because of safety and cost reasons.

Eves said it was very difficult to travel between the towns without using a car: “At the moment, the two roads that link the two towns are very twisty and they have no pavements. They’re rural roads, so nobody can walk and you’d have to be a very brave cyclist. My husband actually says to me: ‘No way are you cycling on that road, it’s far too twisty.’ One way, you have to go uphill all the way so you get irate motorists behind you.”

Does anyone want to share local knowledge on this?

Avatar
kil0ran replied to brooksby | 1 year ago
2 likes

No local knowledge but we have the same issue with the local toffs (Earls no less) here which force cyclists and pedestrians onto similarly rural roads and into lengthy diversions. Particularly annoying as there are estate roads better than most Sustran paths which would join up with a long distance cycleway and provide a 45 mile long traffic-free route.

Maybe the govt's plan for everyone to live within 15 mins of nature by foot or by bicycle will change things. Oh, hang on a minute...

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Backladder replied to brooksby | 1 year ago
2 likes

Two roads eh, how about making one road a walking and cycling route, the cars can all use the other route and everyone's happy!

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Rendel Harris replied to brooksby | 1 year ago
2 likes

Quote:

When appointed vice-lord lieutenant of West Sussex, Kleinwort, who like his ancestors is also a banker...

I have a suspicion the journalist enjoyed writing that sentence.

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brooksby | 1 year ago
0 likes

That rusty hub reminds me of something from cookery.  Does a pineapple have a 'core'?  Something like that... 

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JustTryingToGet... | 1 year ago
2 likes

Favour to ask... anyone know where the thread is where one of the PBU temp identities was demolished by logic regarding bikes damage the road more than wankpanzers. 

I need the maths. Ta. 

 

Avatar
Hirsute replied to JustTryingToGetFromAtoB | 1 year ago
4 likes

Not sure but 4th power rule is used

https://camdencyclists.org.uk/2020/06/the-fourth-power-rule-cyclelicious/

and

//streetsmn.s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/vehicle-weight-and-damage-chart.jpg)

 

sorry for lbs but brexit.

Avatar
JustTryingToGet... replied to Hirsute | 1 year ago
2 likes

hirsute wrote:

Not sure but 4th power rule is used

https://camdencyclists.org.uk/2020/06/the-fourth-power-rule-cyclelicious/

and

//streetsmn.s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/vehicle-weight-and-damage-chart.jpg)

 

sorry for lbs but brexit.

 

bloody brexit 1

That's great, thank you

Avatar
IanMSpencer | 1 year ago
11 likes

https://twitter.com/metpoliceuk/status/1621046000763682817?t=1YlfRnwHAHV...

Man who deliberately rammed a police motorcyclist gets 4 years.

Motorist who deliberately rams cyclist gets no further action. (See multiple previous incidents).

Discuss. (Ducks & runs).

Avatar
Benthic replied to IanMSpencer | 1 year ago
5 likes

They like to look after their own.

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quiff replied to IanMSpencer | 1 year ago
4 likes

Not making judgement on the rights or wrongs of this (or the stark difference in outcome) but committing an offence against someone providing a public service is generally an aggravating factor in sentencing. 

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IanMSpencer replied to quiff | 1 year ago
1 like

Point taken, and I agree with the principle, but doing the same to a vulnerable road user is also an aggravating factor (motorcyclists are of course included in this so that's doubly aggregated in this case).

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quiff replied to IanMSpencer | 1 year ago
0 likes

Good spot. I wonder whether "vulnerable victim" in the sentencing guidance is intended to be something more than "vulnerable road user" though.

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IanMSpencer replied to quiff | 1 year ago
0 likes
quiff wrote:

Good spot. I wonder whether "vulnerable victim" in the sentencing guidance is intended to be something more than "vulnerable road user" though.

Regardless, these are guidelines, and not exclusive, so one would have hoped the unprotected nature of a cyclist, or indeed, pedestrian, would be taken into account, but it does seem courts get very confused when cycling gets involved in a case.

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mattw | 1 year ago
1 like

From yesterday's blog I was surprised to find that codpieces are a thing again. Maybe I have not been watching closely enough.

Why? What's wrong with the Linford Christie lycra-and-lunchbox formula? Is someone underequipped perchance?

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Sanshelmut | 1 year ago
10 likes

I cycle commute every weekday. Today I got my first heckle of the year ("Get out the middle of the road, dickhead!"). 32 days isn't too bad I reckon.

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kil0ran | 1 year ago
6 likes

If you haven't seen it yet, this feature on the history of the womens CX Worlds is a good read - https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/64453786

Avatar
Patrick9-32 | 1 year ago
2 likes

As someone who has four bikes, three of which currently have punctures I haven't got round to fixing yet, I don't appreciate the poor maintenance shaming. :p 

Avatar
JustTryingToGet... replied to Patrick9-32 | 1 year ago
1 like

Patrick9-32 wrote:

As someone who has four bikes, three of which currently have punctures I haven't got round to fixing yet, I don't appreciate the poor maintenance shaming. :p 

If it makes you feel better, I rarely bother sorting mine now unless it's urgent, I wait for issues to accumulate and then get the whole thing sorted... I'm so lazy someone comes to my house to collect the bike!

I quite like this maintenance shaming as I've never let a bike get that bad!

Avatar
Daveyraveygravey replied to Patrick9-32 | 1 year ago
0 likes

Patrick9-32 wrote:

As someone who has four bikes, three of which currently have punctures I haven't got round to fixing yet, I don't appreciate the poor maintenance shaming. :p 

 

Oh, I was expecting this to be about effing hedge trimmers!  My off road routes have been puncture heaven recently, as the local Farmer Giles seem to cut them back with a rusty tea spoon.  They've now started doing some of the country roads just as badly too!

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