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"Non Forgivable Thomas": G faces NFT backlash; 32km/h up 8% climb: How Wout van Aert obliterated Tour de France peloton; Crime of the century: Who stole Pete Kennaugh's wheelie bin?; Roubaix in July; Bike tech for the cobbles + more on the live blog

Happy Paris-Roubaix (in July) Day, everyone! Dan Alexander is back on live blog duty for the rest of the week, starting with a cobble-packed Wednesday edition
06 July 2022, 16:21
And the Oscar for most comedic use of national speed limit signs goes to...
06 July 2022, 15:53
Reports Primož Roglič dislocated shoulder in Roubaix stage fall

There are spreading rumours that Primož Roglič dislocated his shoulder in the fall that saw him lose two minutes to Tadej Pogačar. Daan Hakkenberg reports Roglič's coach, Grischa Niermann, told him the Jumbo-Visma rider put it back in himself before continuing. Pro cyclists are hard as nails...

06 July 2022, 15:34
Taco's straight talking
06 July 2022, 15:19
Simon Clarke wins stage five from the breakaway — Wout van Aert keeps yellow

In the end the breakaway held off a rampaging Tadej Pogačar and Jasper Stuyven. Simon Clarke pipped Taco van der Hoorn to the line in the sprint after Edvald Boasson Hagen has used his acceleration pulling back Neilson Powless. After Magnus Cort, dropped on the final cobbled sector, came Stuyven and Pogačar, the Slovenian taking an even firmer grip on the race.

Jumbo-Visma, Van Aert and Tom Pidcock saved Jonas Vingegaard, Geraint Thomas and Adam Yates' chances, pulling back the gap from over one minute to just 13 seconds by the finish. Consequently, Van Aert is still in yellow. Of the other GC players: Nairo Quintana, Aleksandr Vlasov, G, Enric Mas, Yates, David Gaudu, Rigoberto Urán and Damiano Caruso finished in the Vingegaard group.

Primož Roglič was once again one of the big first-week losers, shipping 2:08 to Pogačar because of a crash. Alexey Lutsenko finished in the same group, while Ben O'Connor and Louis Meintjes lost more than three minutes to the white jersey. Jack Haig crashed out of the race. 

And breathe...

06 July 2022, 14:59
Cycling, resignation, cycling, another resignation, repeat

It seems Britain's cycling fans aren't even getting an opportunity to stop procrastinating during the Tour de France ad breaks at the moment. Come on ministers, give us a break! 

06 July 2022, 14:53
Just Tadej Pogačar going full send on the cobbles

Is there anything this lad can't do?

Jonas Vingegaard and, to make matters worse after his NFT battering, Geraint Thomas are currently losing a minute to Pog, while Primož Roglič is losing two minutes and Ben O'Connor three...

06 July 2022, 14:33
Jonas Vingegaard punctures — Wout van Aert drops back...BUT THEN ROG CRASHES


Vingegaard punctures, Jumbo-Visma (including Van Aert drop back)... only for Primož Roglič to crash moments later. Utter carnage. Jumbo are chasing back in two groups. Meanhwile, Pogačar's on an attack...

Vingegaard's at a minute, Ben O'Connor is more than two minutes down too after a mechanical. Roglič is ahead of O'Connor but 50 seconds behind his teammate. As things stand, Pog will be in yellow at the end of the day BUT we've got a long 25km to go...

06 July 2022, 10:42
"Non Forgivable Thomas": G faces NFT backlash

You know how these go by now. Public figure, in this case Geraint Thomas, posts social media message with catchy copywriter-friendly phrases like "super excited to announce my first NFT collection". Shortly after, said public figure gets ripped to shreds in the replies...

This well-polished tweet from Thomas' account comes just a couple of hours before he'll battle the cobbles of Roubaix, perhaps it was even sent from the team bus (or perhaps a social media manager's undisclosed location), but has left the Ineos pro facing not just the nerves of a huge GC day, but baying fans too...

Anyway, we brought you the news about the project last week: You may not have Mark Cavendish's sprinting power – but you can buy a unique file of it for $80,000 in cycling's latest NFT launch

Here's how G's promo went down...(at the time of writing we could find literally not one supportive comment)... One reply said "I think the comments say it all, sadly. From an athlete who normally gets all the love too." Another somewhat hysterically concluded: "Congrats, you're now a worse person than Lance Armstrong." Let's leave the sin hierarchy there, shall we...

Tell a lie, we found a single positive reply in the sea of more than 100 negatives. For balance...

06 July 2022, 14:15
Cycling Twitter ain't happy with G — the memes...

Not too sure what to make of the next one other than stressing people are very unhappy...

Remember when G's biggest problem was a bit of friendly gilet banter?

06 July 2022, 13:41

Mads Pedersen has attacked, Sagan's crashed, Dani Martínez has punctured...we've still got 70km of heart... 

06 July 2022, 13:17
How's your bike-handling?

Mamma mia!

Wout's back in the convoy, with some help from the Jumbo-Visma team car, but almost fell again. Can we all just calm down so my heart rate can stabilise, please?

Interestingly (and controversialy), the comissaire told Jumbo-Visma not to help their riders get back on. After a short spell of chasing in the wind the team car came through and towed the yellow jersey and Kruijswijk back into the race...

One to keep an eye on... 

06 July 2022, 13:08
Mobile repairs

Simon Clarke (and his one bottle cage) has joined the breakaway. Neilson Powless and Alexis Gougeard are also there, meaning we've got six escapees up the road with a gap of 3:30. More importantly, it's a little over 20km until the cobbles.

And literally the second I was ready to press publish...Wout van Aert has crashed with teammate Steven Kruijswijk. The yellow jersey is down, but in the time it's taken to write this update, he's back up again and on the move. Nervy, nervy times. "Certainly injured but looks like nothing broken," is Wiggo's on-bike analysis. "Back on the bike but he wasn't happy". 

06 July 2022, 12:16
Giro Donne: Marianne Vos wins stage five as Annemiek van Vleuten firefighting saves pink

The Roubaix stage is underway with an escape of breakaway favourites: Magnus Cort (obviously), Edvald Boasson Hagen and Taco van der Hoorn. But the stage will have plenty to do to be the most entertaining race of the day as stage five of the Giro d'Italia Donne was an absolute cracker.

Finishing in Bergamo, tracing some roads famous from Il Lombardia, a crash on the cobbles (yep, Italy's got them too) led to a split which race leader Annemiek van Vleuten was stuck behind.

Giro Donne stage five (Eurosport/GCN)

Then, Elisa Longo Borghini attacked, taking Marianne Vos and second on GC Mavi García with her.

Giro Donne stage five (Eurosport/GCN)

Sensing the danger Van Vleuten bombed down the descent to pull it all back together before compatriot Vos sprinted to her second win of the week.

Giro Donne stage five (Eurosport/GCN)
06 July 2022, 11:19
Meanwhile in the Netherlands

Let's get this lad over to the Isle of Man to find Pete K's bin thief... 

06 July 2022, 09:13
32km/h up 8% climb: How Wout van Aert obliterated Tour de France peloton

Wout van Aert is quite fast, isn't he...

Thanks to the power of Strava we know exactly how fast he was yesterday while smashing it up the final climb to drop...the entire peloton of the Tour de you do...

Obviously Wout also destroyed the KOM, held for just over two years by Julien Antomarchi, who also set his best time during a race — ascending the Cap Blanc-Nez's 860m at 7.9 per cent in 1:54, producing a power of 554w. That effort would have been enough to keep Antomarchi in the peloton yesterday...while to keep up with Van Aert you would have needed to go 17 seconds quicker and average 32km/h...

The fastest time with power data comes from Groupama-FDJ's Kevin Geniets who put out 659w for 1:46... and that was still seven seconds slower than the stage winner...

Oh, and it's not like Wout packed up his tools at the top...aided by a rapid descent the yellow jersey covered the final 10.5km to the finish in 10:20 at an average speed of 61.4km/h...what?!

Will he make it two from two today and continue his streak of podium finishes? Probably not, according to Jumbo-Visma sports director Merijn Zeeman, who told HLN: "It's simple. Our goal is the yellow jersey with Jonas or Primoz and the green with Wout. Wout's yellow is very beautiful, an honour for him and the team, but not a priority for us. We will not defend that yellow." 

06 July 2022, 09:51
Which of these Roval Tour de France wheelsets is best for YOUR bike? (sponsored)

06 July 2022, 09:43
Bora-hansgrohe's "special set-up" for Aleksandr Vlasov
06 July 2022, 08:54
Roubaix in July

It may be going to be 23°C and sunny this afternoon in north west France, but despite the most unlike Hell of the North weather, the Tour peloton is going to take a battering...

TdF 2022 Stage 05 profile

As per Simon's pre-race preview: Just 3km into today’s stage, the race will pass through Roubaix and 11 cobbled sections – the first tackled shortly after the halfway point, and four of them featuring in the Hell of the North – lie in wait, with the longer, tougher ones coming towards the finish. The Arenberg, perhaps the most iconic sector in Paris-Roubaix, won't be among them, but the line will be 500m from its entrance.

At least one GC rider will (probably) lose it all today, let's hope for as fair and upright a race as possible. G's ready...

06 July 2022, 08:26
We're kind of busy this afternoon...
06 July 2022, 07:44
Crime of the century: Who stole Pete Kennaugh's wheelie bin?

It's with regret that we have to start today's live blog with some very serious news from the picturesque Manx village of Laxey. An unassuming setting for one of the great criminal mysteries of our time — who stole Pete Kennaugh's wheelie bin?

Wheelie unfortunate (sorry) that an ex-pro can't even go to the Tour de France for three weeks without the mean streets of Man showing what a dangerous and frightening place to live it is.

Perhaps the Cavendish Cartel is causing terror? (Although for legal reasons we should probably stress we DO NOT actually believe Cav is taking his Tour snub frustration out on Pete K's rubbish...just to be clear...)

Whoever it was, ITV are sure to bring out a three-part drama with David Tennant playing a weathered island detective investigating the most shocking of crimes.

While some suggested Kennaugh had gone 'full Partridge', others sprung into action, including ITV colleague David Millar, who responded to one helpful reply...

That's what a good bin stealer would do, to be fair...cover their tracks...

Jack was more concerned with other parts of the story...

Dan joined in 2020, and spent most of his first year (hopefully) keeping you entertained on the live blog. At the start of 2022 he took on the role of news editor. Before joining, Dan wrote about various sports, including football and boxing for the Daily Express, and covered the weird and wonderful world of non-league football for The Non-League Paper. Part of the generation inspired by the 2012 Olympics, Dan has been 'enjoying' life on two wheels ever since and spends his weekends making bonk-induced trips to the petrol stations of the south of England.

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AlsoSomniloquism | 4331 posts | 1 year ago
NOtotheEU replied to AlsoSomniloquism | 827 posts | 1 year ago

AlsoSomniloquism wrote:

But cyclists......

Thanks for a reminder of the murderous idiots we share the road with. 

The motorcycle crash shows if you use the roads on any kind of two wheeler drivers won't see you and the Police won't care..

AlsoSomniloquism replied to NOtotheEU | 4331 posts | 1 year ago
1 like

Actually not the one I was trying to show. Must have autoplayed to the next clip before I copied the link. 

This is the one on todays BBC showing a BMW mounting the pavement and travelling at what looks like double digit speeds to not have to wait at red lights. 

ktache replied to AlsoSomniloquism | 5920 posts | 1 year ago
1 like

Only one camera though.


FixTheBloodySite replied to ktache | 8064 posts | 1 year ago

On twitter it says it's a shared path
Guess the vehicle user forgot what vehicle they were in.

andystow replied to AlsoSomniloquism | 1180 posts | 1 year ago
1 like

Entitled motorist!

FixTheBloodySite replied to andystow | 8064 posts | 1 year ago
1 like

Dashcam grass !

brooksby replied to AlsoSomniloquism | 12220 posts | 1 year ago
1 like

AlsoSomniloquism wrote:

Actually not the one I was trying to show. Must have autoplayed to the next clip before I copied the link. 

This is the one on todays BBC showing a BMW mounting the pavement and travelling at what looks like double digit speeds to not have to wait at red lights. 

Why did the Beeb decide to blank out their numberplate?

wtjs replied to brooksby | 3086 posts | 1 year ago
1 like

Why did the Beeb decide to blank out their [his] numberplate?

Annoying isn't it?- this insistence that evidence is a matter of opinion. We might expect this sort of nonsense from the police (see the recent topic showing, admittedly on a Twitter post, a distinctive picture of a tattoed driver and the number plate of the vehicle and the puzzled police claiming 'if only we had a means of identifying the driver...!'. It's as if there was problem with me claiming that this is a photo of super-toff Range Rover Velar B6 CAX on the B6430 southbound at 9:17 15.6.22 without MOT, and deciding to blank out the photo and the text showing me wondering why Lancashire Constabulary is so star-struck that officers can't bear to break the news to the toffs that new-car MOT doesn't last forever

Mungecrundle replied to AlsoSomniloquism | 3022 posts | 1 year ago

I am reminded of when seat belts became mandatory and the number of people who were convinced that they would rather be thrown clear of a crashing vehicle than risk becoming trapped by a seat belt.

FixTheBloodySite | 8064 posts | 1 year ago

  • increase the percentage of short journeys in towns and cities that are walked or cycled
  • increase walking
  • double cycling
  • increase the percentage of children aged 5 to 10 who usually walk to school

But how do I carry my bath to my girlfriend's house ?


SimoninSpalding replied to FixTheBloodySite | 595 posts | 1 year ago

Don't be ridiculous!

Obviously you carry her house to your bath using a cargo bike.

Steve K | 1741 posts | 1 year ago

I'm surprised you haven't reported Laura Trott's resignation - oh, well, she can concentrate on cycling now.

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