“We’re introducing new fines to tackle inappropriately dazzling bicycle lights”: Parody ‘mayor’ tricks concerned residents with bizarre post claiming cyclists’ lights limited “to around 30 tealights” to protect motorists’ eyes + more on the live blog
SUMMARY
"My top speed was 116km/h. That's scary": Pro cyclists left shaken by horror crash on descent with "insane speeds", as rider concerned "our bikes and thin tyres aren't made for this"
The fallout to last week’s horrific crash at the AlUla Tour rolled on into the weekend, numerous riders involved giving accounts of just how terrifying the 100km/h+ descent was. Organisers of the early-season race have also come in for criticism over the decision to route the stage down a 20 per cent descent, especially in the finale when speeds, stress and the scrum for positioning were always likely to be high.
Laurenz Rex, Fabian Grellier and Davide Stella were the three riders who came down, it perhaps something of a miracle that three fractured vertebrae was the worst injury, considering the speed and fact the incident spilt onto the rock-strewn roadside.
This has GOT to hurt ?
A blistering 106km/h descent inside the final 15km of Stage 3 caused a three-rider pile up of Laurenz Rex, Davide Stella and Fabien Grellier.
We hope all riders involved are ok ?#AlUlaTour | January 27-31 | SBS On Demand ? pic.twitter.com/tN2HVDbyyu
— SBS Sport (@SBSSportau) January 29, 2026
The TV coverage had just displayed a graphic explaining the camera motorbike was travelling at 106km/h when the crash occurred, reports suggesting Stella hit a cat’s eye, punctured and lost control. Rex’s Strava activity suggests his top speed was 99km/h, however, the accounts of others in the peloton suggest the stage’s top speeds may have been even faster.
Team Picnic-PostNL rider Frits Biesterbos told Belgian newspaper Het Nieuwsblad his top speed was 116km/h.
“That’s scary, yes,” he said. “I saw those three guys crash, and that really gets to you. In moments like that, you just hope it isn’t too serious. You keep going. Is that difficult? You just do it, because crashing unfortunately [it] is sometimes part of racing. I was super focused on my bike, because one small mistake can be fatal. We’ve seen that.”
A rider who knows the life-changing impact a high-speed crash can have is Fabio Jakobsen, who was left in a coma and suffered extensive injuries in a sprint crash at the Tour de Pologne in 2020, which saw Dylan Groenewegen banned from racing for nine months.
“In a descent like that, I avoid all risks,” Jakobsen said of last week’s AlUla Tour crash. “These speeds are insane. I honestly think our bikes and thin tyres aren’t made for this.
“I braked in pulses, that’s what I think you should do in these kinds of steep and ultra-fast descents, although I had the impression that some riders don’t know that. My computer already showed 106km/h. The guys in front of me were going even faster. Above all, I’m incredibly happy and grateful that nobody slammed into that rock wall on the side, because it could have ended much worse.”
Picnic-PostNL are trialling use of Aerobag’s innovative rider airbag this season, although the team’s riders were not using the tech last week. Team boss Roy Curvers sees the potential in rider airbags for racing but stressed they won’t suddenly remove all danger from crashes.
“An airbag can help prevent serious injuries, but it doesn’t stop riders from crashing,” he told Het Nieuwsblad. “A descent like that should never be a matter of life or death, but sometimes it becomes one because of the racing behaviour of some riders. As team management, we have to keep stressing that you shouldn’t take every risk in the world.”
While Rex was remarkably the only rider of the trio to fracture a bone, Grellier and Stella’s teams confirmed the severity of their road rash, even if the TV pictures left little doubt about that.
Stella required “surgical cleaning” and would “remain in hospital under observation”, while Dutch newspaper De Telegraaf reported Grellier underwent emergency surgery on tears (apologies if you’re still eating breakfast) to his anus. The Frenchman’s team TotalEnergies said only that the injuries included “bruises and several deep cuts, requiring several weeks of rest”.
Mathieu van der Poel's record-breaking weekend
Mathieu van der Poel is the first male rider to win EIGHT cyclocross world titles, joining Marianne Vos in that very select club. While there had been talk of retirement if Van der Poel broke the record, afterwards he only hinted at skipping a winter of ‘cross to focus on the road and chase even more wins there.
There were few surprises on the day, a Dutch 1-2 landed as Tibor Del Grosso followed his compatriot and Alpecin-Premier Tech teammate home in second, while Thibau Nys won bronze for Belgium. Things were a fair bit more straightforward than the action of the women’s race the day before…
"We're here to honour him by doing something he enjoyed so much": Thousands join Alex Pretti memorial rides across the US
Reports from the US suggest there were more than 200 memorial rides for Alex Pretti held on Saturday, thousands of cyclists joining in events across the country and around the world.
Last week, Minnesota cycling brands Salsa Cycles, Surly Bikes and Wolf Tooth components urged people to join the Minneapolis ride for Pretti, the popular member of the city’s cycling community who was shot dead by ICE last weekend, the incident the second time a citizen has been killed by a federal agent in the city in recent weeks.
“The Minnesota bike community is one of the most amazing bike communities in the whole nation. You can see it. We’re bidding the world together through love, peace, protest,” one participant told CBS.
The scenes were mirrored in other cities around the US…
Fuck ice
— Jason (@jrock08.bsky.social) 31 January 2026 at 03:01
"Still finding it hard to believe what happened": Nicolas Roche attacked during attempted robbery in Barcelona
Former pro cyclist Nicolas Roche told his Instagram followers he was attacked in Barcelona by three men who were “trying to rob my watch”.
“Just been attacked and beaten up by three men, as I walked out of a restaurant in central Barcelona, trying to rob my watch,” he explained. “Thanks to my girlfriend and the two security agents from the shop further down the street, I managed to not only save my watch but mostly stopped the attackers from beating me more.
“It’s crazy to think that someone in the restaurant must have warned the gang to wait outside for me. I had read about all of this in the news but it’s something else to experience it. Biggest fright of my life. Where I was shocked was that, for over five minutes, people stood there watching as I was on the ground as my girlfriend was shouting for help until, eventually, the two security came out to scare the thieves away.”
Roche said he had a few cuts and bruises but had “thankfully” avoided anything more serious.
West Yorkshire residents to get money off coffees and sausage rolls in return for active travel journeys
People living, working or studying in Leeds, Bradford, Calderdale, Kirklees or Wakefield can sign up to an app which will see time spent running, riding, walking and wheeling converted into rewards that can be used on coffees, sausage rolls and other treats. Flatpack furniture too, Ikea, Starbucks, Argos, Greggs and Costa having already signed up to the scheme, and West Yorkshire Combined Authority is encouraging independent businesses to join too.
The local paper, the Telegraph and Argus, explained how the free BetterPoints app gives users one point for every minute they run, ride, walk or wheel within West Yorkshire, up to 30 minutes every day. You can also earn 15 points for every bus, tram or train journey made over a quarter of a mile within West Yorkshire, up to two journeys a day.
Points can then be converted into vouchers for rewards with the retailers signed up. West Yorkshire Combined Authority said it was predicted the app would prompt a “25 per cent increase in the number of journeys being made on foot, by bike or using public transport among users”.
Jack Windle, Chief Sustainable Transport Officer at BetterPoints said: “Active travel is one of the simplest ways to improve population health, but it needs to feel accessible and worthwhile. BetterPoints helps remove barriers by rewarding everyday journeys and supporting healthier habits while connecting people with local businesses and charities.”
You know those Dutch cyclists are spoilt when this is the type of cycling infrastructure they get to complain about
This hasn’t gone down well in the comments on the thread.
Most inefficiënt bicycle lane in Amsterdam rn and it’s brand new, thoughts?
byu/Smartie_Kroket inAmsterdam
In fairness, for a country that does cycling so well, this new route in Amsterdam is… interesting… but you’re going to struggle to get any sympathy from us UK ‘cycle lane’ users when the pits of your Dutch infrastructure-related despair is an inconveniently wiggly fully-surfaced off-road path.
Someone in the comments shared a photo from the construction phase and had some intel on what happened here:
“I was actually part of the team that made the technical drawings for this project,” they said. “Amsterdam gave the design, and we did the technicals. I asked the same question at the time. It’s meant to slow down cyclists and other users, like people on fat bikes. Funny thing is, those curves ended up being extra sharp because the permit to cut down those two trees in the picture wasn’t properly applied for. So the solution was basically just go around them.”
Sleaford Mods explore the bike industry's woes in latest album... maybe...
An amusing spot by Dave this morning…
Oh, right, you don’t mean that Planet X… Ah, yep, that does make more sense… sorry, it’s just for a minute there I thought the new album was all about the bike industry’s post-pandemic struggles, supply chain woes and Rotherham-based cycling brands having to be saved at the 11th hour by new investors? No, I guess that would be a bit niche…
"Is this really the biggest risk to road safety?": Police force questioned after operation sees eight cyclists fined £50 for riding without lights
Meanwhile, back in the real world…
The world record klaxon has sounded
"It’s nice now, with this new team, to earn our own place there": Tom Pidcock excited to be returning to the Tour de France
Tom Pidcock has taken a break from racking up the big mountain days in Chile to speak about the news his team, Pinarello Q36.5, have been invited to the Tour de France this summer, meaning the Brit will return to the sport’s biggest race after a year away in 2025.
His last memory of the Tour won’t be too fond either, Pidcock having abandoned the 2024 edition days after getting beaten in the gravel stage’s sprint by Anthony Turgis. A second Olympic gold, a few weeks later, undoubtedly softened the blow of that disappointment but Pidcock accepts it’s a race he’s had “ups and downs” at.
“I think it’s really special that we’re going to the Tour de France this year,” he said. “We have earned our place, the team, through our performances last year, that’s given us the right to go there and no one can take that away from us. So I think it’s a massive opportunity. I’ve had ups and downs in the Tour de France the last years, so it’s nice now, with this new team, to earn our own place there.”
So, what can we expect after a breakthrough GC performance finishing on the podium at last season’s Vuelta? Maybe we shouldn’t be too surprised Pidcock isn’t committing to too much this far out.
“I think personally, my biggest objective is to go there, enjoy the suffering, enjoy the intensity of the race, the media with the racing,” he continued. “I think if we can enjoy it and enjoy the suffering as a team, then the results will come from that. We’re a team that’s growing, so to have the opportunity to go and race the Tour is just one step along the way. Of course, where we want to go is to be at the Tour de France every year, racing every year for wins. So yeah, it’s another step on the ladder of where we want to get to.”
Kinesis reckons it has launched the "ultimate endurance aluminium road bike frameset", rivalling the performance of carbon
"We're introducing new fines to tackle inappropriately dazzling bicycle lights": Parody 'mayor' tricks concerned residents with bizarre post claiming cyclists' lights limited "to around 30 tealights" to protect motorists' eyes
Another normal day over on Facebook. The ‘Mayor of Braintree’ has announced new fines for cyclists who use “excessively bright lights”. Now, as you’ve probably read in the headline by now, those quote marks around Mayor of Braintree are because this is not in fact the Mayor of Braintree, but rather a parody account pretending to be the Mayor of Braintree. However you get your kicks, and all that.
Sporting a rather sloppy AI image of a distressed pedestrian almost being run over by a stony-faced, bright-lighted cyclist in a leafy residential street, the ‘Mayor’ informed ‘residents’ that “cyclists in our town will now have their lights restricted to 400 lumens, the equivalent to around 30 tealights”.
“Following numerous complaints by motorists and pedestrians, we are introducing new fines to tackle inappropriately dazzling bicycle lights,” the parody post began.
“Many road-users said that cyclists’ lights presented a serious risk to them as they became momentarily blinded. Pedestrians agreed, with one stating in a recent survey that ‘the power of the light felt like I was having an x-ray’. Cyclists in our town will now have their lights restricted to 400 lumens, the equivalent to around 30 tealights. This is more than adequate as we have excellently lit roads and tracks.
“Anything higher than this will result in the cyclist receiving a fine and having their light(s) confiscated. The safety of all road-users is of paramount importance and – despite some being intimidated by certain cyclist pressure groups – we are not afraid to take the necessary steps to protect people.”
In the comments, someone representing (pretending to be) the local Tealight Manufacturers’ Guild offered full support, while someone else suggested going back to the drawing board as… they’d stuck 30 tealights to their handlebars, but they’d blown out. We’re really not sure what corner of the internet we’ve stumbled upon here. The discussion then pondered if four candles would be too powerful…
There was one rather large nibble from someone not realising it was a parody post, the reply asking why cars with even brighter, more dazzling lights wouldn’t be attracting fines… to which the ‘Mayor’ insisted the authorities “aren’t aware of car lights causing issues”.
Since the cycling lights post blew up, the ‘Mayor’ has moved on to bigger issues… such as free ‘picking up poo’ lessons for all dog owners in the town and… *checks notes* banning Stephen Yaxley-Lennon from protests in Braintree as his visa approval has been delayed amid questionable media credentials and a lack of confirmation of the individual’s name. “We cannot just let anyone into our town centre,” the ‘Mayor’ told residents… needless to say that comments section makes bike lights look like child’s play…
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@Rendel Harris you've painted a rather alluring picture of social harmony there, but unfortunately you've got my name wrong. I'm Jack, not Nigel. However, to return the compliment, I must think of a story for you. I imagine you sat outside a pub, real ale and pipe propped on the adjacent table, in a similar fashion to Nigel Farage at his populist best. You turn to your wife. "You know what dear? I think I've been a bit harsh in my time. I've shunned the politeness and wisdom of others for too long and want to change my ways.* "There there Rendel", says Mrs Harris. "You're not a bad old stick, it's just living in London that's emptied your soul of kindness and compassion. I've found a lovely new place where we can settle down in our later years. It's on a leafy cul de sac, surrounded by friendly neighbours and smiling faces. There's a guy a couple of doors down, a remarkable man. As well as his towering intellect and rapier wit, he's also a keen cyclist, holding severa local KOMs. Don't be perturbed dear - he'll ride with anyone provided they show other road users the kindness and courtesy they deserve." Rendel turned emotionally, voice shaking. "Oh my dear, thank you for this second chance", and with that the rest of the pub goers turned and applauded the couple, throwing garlands of petals in their wake. The end.
As a Councillor, Edward needs to be paying some attention to all that parking obstructing visibility and manoeuvres at the junction, and sorting out those radii.
Ed Hill was chucked out by Reform in 2025, though TBF to him it was about how to run it rather than ideology I think. He is now reportedly closer to Advance UK, which is distinctly more extreme than Reform. I'd call this Alan Amos style attention seeking.
Emily, thank you for such an insightful piece. I’m a man, but I enjoy watching the women’s races, possibly more than the men’s. The racing is so much closer, we rarely know who’s going to win. You painted a wonderful picture of how a true champion is able to ‘rise above’ setbacks and distractions, and focus their energy on the task in hand. ‘All’s fair in live and war -and sport, but always good to hear riders expressing their admiration for their competitors
@Nigel Garage ...and then everyone applauded my courtesy and I waved courteously to all the people who were courteously throwing flowers and cheering and courteously waving flags that said "Nigel is the best!"
The picture from street view clearly shows give way lines from the roads to the green painted cycle/pedestrian lane. The road user should give way (or must...) to the user of the green lane. This would of course apply to any cyclist on the roadway.
If I recall there is a cave or two along the route - perhaps they were sheltering from the heat in one of those having taken it for a Golf bunker?
“So if there’s a cyclist travelling down the cycle path at the moment, from this position I can’t see them because my blind spots are too big on the left hand side of the vehicle”, claims Hill. Well, there's your problem, right there...🙄
First impression from the headline that he's likely a twit. Then the detail he was expelled from Reform makes you suspect that failing even their low bar requirements he really is. Then he clearly explains his vehicle is unsafe for the highway because he can't see to give way when turning. Any collision he now has should have that video run out explaining he drove a vehicle he knew to be unsafe. Advice for motorists; instead of thinking that pedestrians and cyclists are low risk 100kg objects, imagine them as a 300 Tonne trains that will crush you and your vehicle if you cross into their paths. You'd give way to the train, so you equally can to the others.
I've had a brief look on Facebook, and Ed Hill (who now appears to be affiliated with Advance UK) seems to have taken some useful road safety improvements under his remit, including an initiative to help local pedestrians on unpaved roads, where the wider council won't help due to planning failures. Regarding the cycle path, I think this is linked to a wider misunderstanding about giving way at junctions and I'm afraid I cannot agree with Mr Hill's conclusion. Regardless of the suitability of the cycle path, vehicles should give way at the junction to both pedestrians crossing and cyclists. It seems to be a poorly understood rule among motorists where some believe they have priority at junctions like this, where they certainly do not. I once had a similar issue myself, while leisurely walking to Waitrose to buy some lunchtime fripperies. A driver beeped their horn as I crossed the junction, despite me having priority, and was shocked and apologetic when I explained I had priority. A polite conversation later, the driver departed, educated and updated on the rules of the road.
26 thoughts on ““We’re introducing new fines to tackle inappropriately dazzling bicycle lights”: Parody ‘mayor’ tricks concerned residents with bizarre post claiming cyclists’ lights limited “to around 30 tealights” to protect motorists’ eyes + more on the live blog”
“Drivers have lost respect
“Drivers have lost respect for learners, tutor says“
Interesting how the article includes the line:
“We need to get back to the idea that driving is a privilege, not a right.”
Could this increase the spread of dashcams and as is relatively well known:
the majority of video evidenced reports of dangerous driving are from OTHER DRIVERS (rather than demonised cyclists)?
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c0mkj28127yo
Driver behaviour has just got
Driver behaviour has just got worse. Its as simple as that. If you’re a driving instructor its got worse for your pupils, if you are a cyclist or a pedestrian, its got worse for you.
I could honestly drive like a complete twat around where I live and I wouldn’t be particularly worried about being caught or fined.
Shit driving is normalised, dangerous driving is ignored and people who crash for the afforementioned reasons are treated like unwilling participants in a situation they couldn’t possibly have avoided.
Your second paragraph
Your second paragraph explains the problem – very little policing of the roads and even when caught drivers tend to be treated very leniently by the legal system. Until both of those change, roads aren’t likely to get any safer.
Shit and dangerous driving in
Shit and dangerous driving in bigger and wider cars is sadly the new norm. Deliquant motorists couldn’t care less because injuring or killing cyclists doesn’t take one to jail.
Weird robbers they have in
Weird robbers they have in Barcelona – going around assaulting people with Tippex pens.
Probably ex-cons, recently
Probably ex-cons, recently out of a correction centre.
Much as I love seeing (and
Much as I love seeing (and riding) a good fast descent, 20% slopes in that situation is ludicrous. If it’s impossible, for the sake of the preceding climb, to find another route then surely a good place to impose a “safety car” protocol, all commissaire bikes and cars, police outriders etc instructed not to exceed a given speed, say 75 km/h, and sanctions for any riders who overtake them.
I imagine that would be hard
I imagine that would be hard to police and be a nightmare. Guys at the front would be behind the car, guys further back would be able to push their luck to make up time they lost on the climb.
I think its very hard to set speed limits on descents unless you want to start tracking GPS and changing race results at the end of races. You couldn’t do average speeds either because i’m sure that on some corners/sections they would be doing far less than the limit so an average would allow them to push on elsewhere.
Its a really tricky issue because it is so dangerous even at the speeds they went at 20 years ago. 100km/h is still insane.
mctrials23 wrote:
It’s ridiculous I agree; my highest is 87kph on a long, straight, traffic-free road that I’d already reconnoitred for surface imperfections etc, in perfect conditions, and that scared the bejasus out of me, the idea of doing it on a twisty road with a peleton around me with steep drops (the road I did it on was going down a valley) is mad.
I think you underestimate the available tech in the peleton now, apart from the fact that in a big race virtually no rider is ever far from some sort of moto (maybe press/camera bikes could join in too?). It’s possible for speed data to be seen for every rider in real time from their head units, so anyone exceeding the limit could be swiftly called back into line on race radio; if they ignore instructions, in-race DQ.
A 20% descent is insane,
Agreed, a 20% descent is insane.
Road racing feels like F1 of old, where there’s an expectation of injury and death. Once that’s no longer deemed acceptable, it turns out it wasn’t necessary all along.
AidanR wrote:
You mean F1 wasn’t?
That too. But I meant the
That too. But I meant the deaths!
May I humbly suggest, as a
May I humbly suggest, as a Leeds cyclist, that the West Yorkshire Combined Authority focuses on actually creating safer cycling routes than on handing out sausage rolls? Why oh why do councils insist on publicity gimmicks rather than actual infrastructure?
Because you can’t get 8
Because you can’t get 8 quality cycling routes for 99p from Aldi.
In Amsterdam you get a Curly
In Amsterdam you get a Curly Wurly.
GMBasix wrote:
You certainly do!
I agree with you – but to an
I agree with you – but to an extent. To increase modal share is not as straightforward as just building infrastructure. It’s probably the most important element but it does not do it on it’s own. Behaviour change is also important – things like Bikeability (which is very targeted at children) Then there is cycle parking and storage. And then things like this app which incentivise. People respond to rewards – check out the proliferation of ‘loyalty cards’ over the past decades. Everyone has at least one loyalty card. This is the same idea. But I do agree, without high quality, contiguous cycle lanes it’s a difficult fight. But it’s a start – and a cheap one.
In theory “just remove the
Yes.
In theory “just remove the cars” – but how?! In practice UK towns and cities have only been able to do that in very limited contexts if they’ve tried * eg. small pedestrianised areas in centres. And that tends to create a ring of conflict just outside as everyone drives to the stroll.
So (for various reasons) as you say infra is not *sufficient* but necessary.
I’d suggest the most important factor in behaviour change here is simply “getting people to drive less”. That is expressed as “fewer short distance trips” and also “more use of public transport”. With cycling filling the first role and acting to expand the reach of the second.
What is the motivating factor for people to change? Making driving less attractive relative to other modes for some of these trips.
* LTNs / no through traffic areas are the other way to get most of the benefits but a) devil is in detail and b) this term has been seized as a rallying cry for “no war on the motorist!” objectors. But this constitutes the main type of “infra” by area in NL, I think: https://bicycledutch.wordpress.com/2025/01/08/when-is-there-no-need-for-protected-cycling-infrastructure/
Rome73 wrote:
Not I sir! Oh, wait, I have a couple of those coffee shop stamp cards…
May I humbly suggest, as a
May I humbly suggest, as a Leeds cyclist, that the West Yorkshire Combined Authority focuses on actually creating safer cycling routes than on handing out sausage rolls? Why oh why do councils insist on publicity gimmicks rather than actual infrastructure?
the little onion wrote:
It’s cheaper and motornormatives don’t really want to take space away from drivers.
Why did the cyclist cross the
Why did the cyclist cross the road?
Because it saw the sausage roll…
I’ll get my coat…
Pub bike wrote:
Because the road designer hadn’t considered continuity in the cycle path provision.
UCI claims riders’ safety is
UCI claims riders’ safety is their top priority. Yet they allow race organisers to include steep and fast downhill sections without proper marshalling and neutralisation.
While I like the idea of the
While I like the idea of the BetterPoints app, it would be good to know what the £ figure per active travel mile works out at.
From memory I red years ago that active travel benefits the economy by 25p per mile, while driving costs the economy 50p per mile.
Those figures would need to be adjusted for inflation now.
Don’t have links to hand but
Don’t have links to hand but I believe there are several studies in different countries pointing in the same direction.
OTOH it could probably be argued that providing for motoring at some level facilitates other “goods”. And we could always just decide that we *want* it so much that all taxpayers should fund it (we currently pick up the cost of the “externalities” whether we drive or not).
Got to hand it to the architects of mass motoring though, they’ve managed to sell everyone the exact opposite of the truth eg. mass motoring is economically good and makes for better places. Along with “vulnerable road users are *in the way* of motorists and if they’re injured it’s *their* fault”.