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Victim's bike targeted five times, always on a Wednesday, while parked at train station...

Police in Denmark have gone public with news that a female cyclist is being targeted by a man who masturbates onto her bicycle’s saddle while it is parked at a train station, hoping that media coverage will shame the perpetrator into stopping.

On five occasions now, all of them on a Wednesday, the 19-year-old woman has returned to Mørdrup Station to discover that her saddle has been targeted by the anonymous onanist, says The Copenhagen Post, citing a report from the tabloid newspaper Ekstra Bladet.

“At first I thought that it was some kind of sick joke, but when it happened for the third time I decided it was enough and reported it to the police. It’s bloody disgusting,” said the victim, who unsurprisingly does not want her identity to be known.

She also says that she believes children in a local primary school playground may be able to see the man as he commited the offence.

Henrik Hattel, assistant police commissioner for North Zealand, commented: “We’re hoping that this will get the freak to quit doing it. That’s the most important thing for us. It’s difficult to say how we should punish the man.”

It was not reported whether police were looking at other measures such as deploying camera surveillance or positioning officers nearby on a Wednesday.

Although the woman has not actually seen the perpetrator while he is engaged in his solitary act, assistant commissioner Henk believes that law relating to indecent exposure may apply in this case.

"Otherwise the woman wouldn’t have called us,” he explained. “Her decency has been violated on some kind of level.”

The Copenhagen Post, whose story has the rather arresting headline of ‘Woman stalked by serial bicycle-seat wanker,’ says that so far no witnesses have been found, nor have they tested the substance left on the saddle to confirm it actually is semen, however they have no doubts over the veracity of the victim’s report.

Born in Scotland, Simon moved to London aged seven and now lives in the Oxfordshire Cotswolds with his miniature schnauzer, Elodie. He fell in love with cycling one Saturday morning in 1994 while living in Italy when Milan-San Remo went past his front door. A daily cycle commuter in London back before riding to work started to boom, he's been news editor at road.cc since 2009. Handily for work, he speaks French and Italian. He doesn't get to ride his Colnago as often as he'd like, and freely admits he's much more adept at cooking than fettling with bikes.

27 comments

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FatDadOnABike [13 posts] 3 years ago
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Eugh, too much information road.cc. I really didn't need to read this whilst eating my lunch  31

(guess I shouldn't have clicked on the link then ...)

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mad_scot_rider [581 posts] 3 years ago
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okay...

that hits a 10 on my weird shit o-meter

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Gkam84 [9086 posts] 3 years ago
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What a w*nker.

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phy2sll [34 posts] 3 years ago
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Anonymous Onanist

Could be a downtempo drum & bass act.

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themartincox [500 posts] 3 years ago
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“We’re hoping that this will get the freak to quit doing it"

we've gone way past political correctness here!

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timbola [244 posts] 3 years ago
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Noticed the Wiggle Etape Cymru advert on this page ? Check the jersey ...

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Carl [137 posts] 3 years ago
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How unpleasant.

They don't say what kind of bike it was but I'm guessing it's a Colnago?

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andyp [1448 posts] 3 years ago
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Those parked bikes are getting me proper aroused.

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dullard [140 posts] 3 years ago
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According to the Copenhagen Post report, the police haven't even established that it's semen on the saddle; it's just been on the say so of the accuser. And nobody's seen anybody cracking one off onto the saddle. Curiouser and curiouser. And how did she determine that it was indeed semen, I wonder... Time to call in Sarah Lund.

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dave atkinson [6223 posts] 3 years ago
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timbola wrote:

Noticed the Wiggle Etape Cymru advert on this page ? Check the jersey ...

very droll  1

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dave atkinson [6223 posts] 3 years ago
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dullard wrote:

According to the Copenhagen Post report, the police haven't even established that it's semen on the saddle; it's just been on the say so of the accuser. And nobody's seen anybody cracking one off onto the saddle. Curiouser and curiouser. And how did she determine that it was indeed semen, I wonder... Time to call in Sarah Lund.

perhaps it's just some wayward energy gel from a passing roadie, and there's a lot of linden trees near the station

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4p0uw42cdo

 4

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Mat Brett [625 posts] 3 years ago
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Hope this story has a happy ending.

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ubercurmudgeon [169 posts] 3 years ago
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dullard wrote:

Time to call in Sarah Lund.

That could well make the problem worse.

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antonio [1124 posts] 3 years ago
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Wednesday Wanker,obviously!!

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merckxman [40 posts] 3 years ago
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Come on...

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merckxman [40 posts] 3 years ago
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merckxman wrote:

Come on...

It must be a Crank Brothers saddle bag...

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Sadly Biggins [269 posts] 3 years ago
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Surely someone must have seen him coming by now?

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Iration Wheelers [5 posts] 3 years ago
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Honestly who would get off on this sort of sick, twisted stuff. Really sickening, I mean cant this individual just a get a girlfriend like a normal guy and stop obsessing over girls on bikes. I mean there is seriously something wrong here. Now we have all once or twice strayed onto www.copenhagencyclechic.com but, come on, this really takes the biscuit.  31

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sidesaddle [89 posts] 3 years ago
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Iration Wheelers wrote:

... Now we have all once or twice strayed onto www.copenhagencyclechic.com but, come on, this really takes the biscuit.  31

Ty for that link. Can't help noticing that style is inversely proportional to helmet wearing.

... contd p98

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londonplayer [620 posts] 3 years ago
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I hope it's a Fizik otherwise I won't be able to understand this.

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nabobofthrob [4 posts] 3 years ago
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He probably tried it just for once found it alright for kicks. Then he found out its a habit that sticks !

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Simon_MacMichael [2450 posts] 3 years ago
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nabobofthrob wrote:

He probably tried it just for once found it alright for kicks. Then he found out its a habit that sticks !

Those stains on his jeans will take some explaining to his mother  3

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fatbeggaronabike [815 posts] 3 years ago
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Always happens on a wednesday but the rozzers can't be bothered to put surveillance in place for one day? they tell the papers instead. Also as it says in the report there is a school close by so worringly she or her bike may not be the target of this perverts actions.

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bikeylikey [204 posts] 3 years ago
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What makes you think there's human involvement? It's the bike trying to reproduce. Bikes are taking over the world (see Daily Mail for further information). She's a lucky girl to be the Chosen First One. Mwa ha ha haaaaa

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bfslxo [144 posts] 3 years ago
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That revoshift grip in the pic has me thinking - better grip more control, stronger stroke - ok stopping now!!  9

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Karbon Kev [688 posts] 3 years ago
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ha ha wonderful. You couldn't make this stuff up, priceless!

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andyp [1448 posts] 3 years ago
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Well, it's Wednesday. Eagerly awaiting updates. Has the saddle-spaffer been back in action?