Disengaging with close passers

You need to report this. He chased after you.

Maybe drive up the road to see if you can identify the car as you say he likely lives up there.

He may well be known to the police.

I have been knocked off my bike and injured several times, punched, spat at, doored, you name it, over many years of cycling. Only in this country, however, but never in Ireland, France, Spain or India, where I have cycled extensively and only met with good humour (yes some hairy driving skills!).

I agree with others that swearing is great, but I try to avoid further confrontation. I worry though that it then eats away inside me, so I am talking to a counsellor about my feelings of anger and wanting to clock drivers with my D-Lock.

I am thinking of buying cameras as all my efforts to get the police to take any action in previous incidents failed.

Totally understand your feelings on this. I always like to think of myself as a pretty chilled fella, but honestly if I feel someone has put me at risk, or unfairly wronged me or a companion, it's a sudden internal battle to stop the red mist descending and potentially escalating a situation. It's also a perfectly normal response to shout out or react in an animated fashion if you've just experienced a scary situation, and those sort of reflex responses are pretty hard to eliminate. I have definitely benefitted in recent years from trying to acknowledge (either externally or internally) when someone has been decent and 'done the right thing' when I'm out riding. Yes there is the argument that we shouldn't have to 'thank' a driver when they are simply doing what they're supposed to be doing anyway, but it helps me remember that the majority of drivers ARE considerate and will wait for a safe overtaking opportunity for example. I also like to think that in some small way, me waving thanks to that driver who passed nice and wide, or the one that waited for me at the side road instead of pulling out will go on their journey thinking about that 'polite' cyclist, and just maybe they will be that bit more considerate with the next one they pass. This could all be complete fanciful bollox of course but hey, it helps me stay calmer and appreciate my cycling for the right reasons, so it's good enough for me.

I really understand your emotions. You have just been the victim of criminal threatening behaviour.

I am learning about myself that no matter how in the right I am, no matter how smart I am, and no matter how tough I am....any confrontations never have a winner. I still swear at close-passers and other drivers who put me in danger: it is completely instinctive due to the speed that events unfold. They also need to know about the danger they are causing. But if they don't continue on their way, then there are normally a few seconds before any next chapter begins. This is the time I make myself take stock. If there is absolutely no other option than to fight for my safety then I would do exactly that - and without restraint. But there has never been such a case, as usually there is another option - and that is to back down. It is a hard decision for me to have had come to ( I'm 6ft 3in ) but if necessary, I will now even actually apologise to someone who has nearly run me over, if they come back for afters which is looking to turn physical. By this time they already know I found their driving unacceptable - shoving my point down their throat further won't add much. I'm not going to jail for something I didn't invite. I'm not going to take injuries simply for the winning of my point. What I most want is to be out of there; away from this person who is not a part of my life; and to be back on my bike. And the quickest route to that for me is to say: "sorry sir ( madam ? ) I shouldn't have sworn at you". And I make sure there is no sarcasm present in there either. I have found it is very difficult for the assailant to keep building up to their boiling point once I have conceded in such a way. It sounds really counter-intuitive to back down. But 2 minutes later I am back on my bike doing what I love ( with only a small bitter taste in my mouth ). Rather than spending hours in A and E, or giving a statement to police about my own actions. Also I know I won morally by not retaliating. And I can choose to untwine from that person mentally.

The assailant can still be brought to account by reporting to the police. Camera footage is obviously helpful - but people got charged before action-cameras were invented. So don't be fobbed off if you wish to take things further - even if only to prevent it happening to the next person. 

I really believe there is nothing to be gained by fighting at the roadside unless the assailant is hellbent on murder. I will instead take a tactical loss to my pride, not a strategic loss to my standards or my liberty.

Keep safe.

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when you get into a road rage situation, you'll get the flight or fight response. Its almost impossible to ignore it. It has caused many people to fight in the street over something minor, whereas if they were walking with others they would never dream of attacking someone they didnt know. You will likely meet other wankers on the road, who deem cyclists frail, feeble or to up their own arses to get a car. Don't respond to them. Dont stop. Get away and never let them back you into a corner. What i do is not this, because of my past experiences. I will admit, i spent 6 years of my life in prison, for assault. Someone was attacking his ex girlfriend, slamming her into the wall, so i intervened, especially as she was my work collegeue. It didnt end well. I got sent down for GBH and he went to hospital, into intensive care. Nowadays, if i cycle and come across an idiot who tries to attacked or rage with me, i wont back down, i will try to de escalate the situation, by saying to them'' i understand you are angrym, but stop for ten seconds, and just breathe, so we can sort this out.'' By then, the flight or fight response has subsided somewhat, and they may be inclined to listen to you, rather than just shouting abuse and fighting you. Its part of our evolution sadly. The bloke in the photo is one i got into a fight with, over a shared path, and it would never happen if we were just two blokes walking through a town. But put one person in a car, and the other on a bicycle, and the responses of both sides completely change. 

What you experienced was an assault. There is no other way to describe it.  I read your question as how could you have defused the situation enough to get out of it. The key is to not escalate the situation. No matter what, don't engage your assailant in an angry argument. It will never end well.

There is a practice we used in the Fire / Rescue Brigade I was in which is called "Verbal Judo".  There is a book by that name which was written by the late George Thompson, PhD, who was a professor of English turned police officer.

It may not be the best written book ever, and he was very full of himself, but the principals are sound: in a confrontation attempt to deflect the agressor verbaly and get them to see that there is another side to the conflict.  An example of this is described in this article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/promoting-empathy-your-teen/201210/how-use-verbal-judo

Your angry driver might respond to something like, "look, I understand that this road is too narrow and the council should make it wide enough for two vehicles to pass safely, but until they do that we all need to be careful of other users on the road." If you are lucky, they may go off on a rant about "the effing council."

I don't know if you have a Methamphetamine problem in that area but if you do, nothing short of overwhelming force will work.  Some people under the influence of alcohol will behave the same way.  They are agitated and angry.  We always got police on scene when dealing with these people. You need to get away from those people as fast as you can.

Some people are just plain "bat shit crazy", as in paranoid schizophrenic.  They can be deflected, but don't ever try to play them.  They know that you can't hear the voices in their head.  Also, they are very rarely violent.

If you can, get away from them.  If not, deflect them.  An example: my daughter works in a Psychiatric Emergency Services unit in a big city hospital.  She is about 5'4" and not physically intimidating.  An an aggitated patient was complainiing that someone was trying to cut their hair.  She got them a towel to wrap over their hair.  They calmed down. The non-existance of the person trying to cut their hair should never be the issue.

I hate things like this.  It brings out the worst in me - fortunately only in theory not practice.  I can't help thinking that idiots who behave like that do so because they're confident that they're not going to get a violent response, and mostly they're right.  All you need is for them to fall and hit their head and it's game over for you - a nasty role-reversal in which you have nowhere to go.  No 'SMIDSY', no 'he wobbled out in front of me', no 'the sun was in my eyes', or 'he wasn't wearing Hi-viz or a helmet'.  You pushed him and he died.  Criminal record for ever. Wife, family, job, all stuffed.

All you can do is shrug it off, and acknowledge the good when you see it.  But, dear god, it's hard.  I followed a van down a country lane yesterday.  He was slow and careful.  He passed several on-coming cyclists carefully.  He and I followed several others for a while.  When he stopped, I stopped too and thanked him for driving carefully.  All one can do.

Commuting in town, I have cameras.  That got beyond a joke.

Sorry to read what happened, it is a part of riding a bike in the UK these days though, and has been for at leat 30 years.  Nobody in a car thinks they are ever wrong, especially when it comes to a "pleb" on a bike.  I react every time to every close pass or bit of bad driving, I have toned it down in the last couple of years, I'm even trying not to swear, but it's hard when "Cnut" covers it perfectly.

I'm not a fighter so on the rare occasion it gets to that level, I calm it down if I haven't already taken to my heels.  I can't let it go though, if you gesticulate at a close pass in my experience every car after that gives you an exaggerated amount of room.

I've tried a camera, but it's a cheap one.  It only records about 70 minutes and most of my commutes are more than that one way.  It's also blurry and under trees it can be hard to make out reg plates anyway.  Even if you get good footage you have to edit it, and remember to clear the memory card before you go out again.

Cameras.  I'd rather not be sitting at home with a busted bike and body (not injured badly enough that I'm considered a priority case by the NHS) with the police telling me they can't find who it was and there's nothing they can do, as opposed to them telling me they'd analysed the video and arrested the driver.  The cost of a front and back camera will pale into insignificance when you start replacing bikes and fixing yourself (my Chiropractor charges £50 a session).  Sort of insurance, or spend money to save money.  I don't download bad passes, but anything deliberate and aggressive and the video would be straight to the police.

I totally empathize. I try every day to avoid confrontation. And it's difficult to stay calm. The one thing i do know is that when i get into a confrontation it determines my mood for the rest of the day (i.e.bad, angry, frustrated) and i even spend the night tossing and turning thinking about the bastard who cut me up and the injustice of it. It's never worth that. A finger on my left hand is permanently dislocated because i punched a car so hard once. So now i use a camera. I just feel 'safer'. If anyone starts shouting at me I unclip the camera from the mount and point it at them and keep my gob shut. The camera is like a cross to a vampire - it backs them off. 

Bloody tragic that it's like this - imagine if pedestrians had to carry cameras to record hostile road user behaviour towards them. There would be a national outcry. 

Reg no, make (Audi?) description of assailant, photos of injuries? You can't not report this! Chances are your man is pretty practised at this sort of thing, so may be known to police.

FWIW, always intone to myself in times of stress "you don't know who they are or what they're capable of". 

In an interesting point - get wild on him as he stops and opens the door but I think on balance all you "knee him in the stomach" posters have been watching too many movies - glorious though it would be #channels inner Rod liddle# to subdue him with a couple of blows from a Topeak and head off with his keys in your pocket. 

I've found an increasing number of oncoming drivers will pass on single track lanes without slowing down. As a result my normal procedure now is to move out towards the centre of the road and apply the brakes if the driver appears to be approaching too fast. The driver then has to make the choice to slow/stop or kill me. It works every time as you can tell by the fact I am still alive to post this comment and it has not resulted in any arguments or problems yet. I always run cameras which are an unfortunate necessity.

What could you have done differently?

Hit the arsehole as soon as he walked up to you - no engagement just wack him as soon as he's got out of his car. Then for good measure, chuck his keys and ride off.

Attack is the best form of defence and if you can get in while they still think you're a going to be a pushover so much the easier.

Of course it may not pan out exactly like this but you get the idea. 

Alternatively, you could have not shouted and continued to let the guy be a cunt.

Neither option is entirely satisfactory.