Support road.cc

Like this site? Help us to make it better.

feature

18 things that cyclists hate — duff rides you should try and avoid

We love cycling but just occasionally it all goes horribly wrong

We love cycling. No, we really love cycling, and we like to dwell on the positive whenever possible. But sometimes, just sometimes, it can be – what’s the word? – challenging.

Here are 18 things that we reckon every cyclist hates. Do you agree?

1 Clicking down a gear, only to find out you’re already in the lowest gear
That’s bad. Really bad.

2 Thinking you’re at the top of the hill, then discovering you aren’t
What, there’s more? How much more? Oh no!

3 The bonk
Blowing up, the hunger knock, hitting the wall… When you’re out of energy, it feels like the end of the world.

4 Creaks and squeaks

13Bikes Intuition Beta - bottom bracket

Is it the headset? The bottom bracket? The saddle rails? Your knees?

You can sometimes go around the whole bike systematically eliminating each individual component as the source of a mysterious noise until there are none left. And it still bloody creaks.

5 Red traffic lights
They’re especially bad if they’re at the bottom of a hill. All that momentum gone in a flash. Grrr!

6 Cold fingers
Still, it’s not as bad as the feeling of cold fingers coming back to life. That’s pure evil.

7 Punctures
It goes without saying, really.

Rema Tip Top TT02 repair kit

8 You attack as hard as you can, check over your shoulder to see how much of a gap you have… and they’re still on your wheel
Bollocks.

9 Forgetting you’re clipped in until it’s too late
Don’t even try to make out it didn’t hurt. You’re fooling no one.

10 Your light goes out
You knew you should have recharged it, didn’t you?

Cateye Rapid 3 front

11 It starts to rain the moment you put your kit on
You had nice weather all morning too. Also, while we’re at it: needing to use the toilet as soon as you put your bibs on.

12 Putting on wet kit for your commute home
It rained on the way into work this morning and the seatpad is still soggy. Urgh!

13 Unacknowledged waves
You wave or nod at a cyclist coming the other way and they don’t do it back. Rude!

14 Tyre sidewall splitting 
The first you feel is a strange knocking coming from either the fork or the chainstays. If you’re really unlucky, within a few seconds you’ll hear a sound like a gunshot. That’s the inner tube exploding. Now you’re in trouble.

15 Getting dropped
From beginner to World Champion, it hurts just the same.

16 Running out of drink

Camelbak Podium water bottle.jpg

This usually happens when you’re in the back of beyond, rarely when there’s a service station just around the corner.

17 The turbo

Elite Real Axiom Trainer - riding

A lot of us do it, but only as a means to an end. You put up with the short-term pain for the long-term fitness gains. But you know there are some lunatics who actually enjoy it?

18 Getting caught in the rain

Marrakech Atlas Etape Still Images4

This usually happens just after you’ve cleaned your bike, when you’re wearing a white jersey, or on the day you forgot your waterproof. Or all three.

Over to you. What did we miss? Don’t hold back now!

Mat has been in cycling media since 1996, on titles including BikeRadar, Total Bike, Total Mountain Bike, What Mountain Bike and Mountain Biking UK, and he has been editor of 220 Triathlon and Cycling Plus. Mat has been road.cc technical editor for over a decade, testing bikes, fettling the latest kit, and trying out the most up-to-the-minute clothing. He has won his category in Ironman UK 70.3 and finished on the podium in both marathons he has run. Mat is a Cambridge graduate who did a post-grad in magazine journalism, and he is a winner of the Cycling Media Award for Specialist Online Writer. Now over 50, he's riding road and gravel bikes most days for fun and fitness rather than training for competitions.

Add new comment

140 comments

Avatar
antonio | 7 years ago
9 likes

Traffic lights all on red when you're flying, traffic lights all on green when you're knackered!no

Avatar
BarryBianchi | 7 years ago
11 likes

Factious list articles.

Avatar
beezus fufoon | 7 years ago
9 likes

goats

Avatar
jonathing | 7 years ago
3 likes

Water running down the road towards you.

Avatar
jimbo2112 | 7 years ago
10 likes
  • Car drivers that are idiots
  • Cyclists that jump lights
  • Bad coffee
  • Being ill and not being able to ride
  • Winter early nights
  • Headwinds (can't believe you missed that one)
  • Saddle sore
  • Strava routing you through fields/forest trails
  • Awful gravel resurfacing
  • Losing a KOM
  • Doing a cycle trip and leaving stuff behind

But, the list of good stuff is far longer!

Avatar
Mockenrue | 7 years ago
4 likes

Half wheelers!

Avatar
StuInNorway | 7 years ago
2 likes

Nr 5 - Red lights at bottom of hill, I used to commute via Muswell Hill in London with lights at the bottom of a cracking hill, it was a real skill to read the timings from the top by how many cars were waiting where to ensure rocketing though at full speed.  Now here, one of my routes that used to be great has a set of lightshalfway down, that seem to have a bike sensor that goes red when you're exactly at the point it's too late to dash through, but not so far back that you can do anything other than brake HARD ! 
Nr 18 also usually occurs (if you don't havewaterproofs with you, as when you left it was perfectly blue skies and no forecast even of clouds) at the furthers point possible from home, and normally exactly havfway between the only 2 bridges on the route there is to shelter under.

Avatar
StuInNorway replied to StuInNorway | 6 years ago
0 likes

StuInNorway wrote:

Nr 5 - Red lights at bottom of hill, I used to commute via Muswell Hill in London with lights at the bottom of a cracking hill, it was a real skill to read the timings from the top by how many cars were waiting where to ensure rocketing though at full speed.  Now here, one of my routes that used to be great has a set of lightshalfway down, that seem to have a bike sensor that goes red when you're exactly at the point it's too late to dash through, but not so far back that you can do anything other than brake HARD ! 

Been there, done that. used to commute Wathamstow to Brent Cross and Muswell Hill heading home was FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN until the lights changed as you neared the bottom... Where I am now, they recently installed new traffic lights halfway down the 2 best hills we have here... 

Avatar
StraelGuy | 7 years ago
9 likes

Disc brakes that yowl in the rain.

Avatar
part_robot | 7 years ago
5 likes

Rubbing disc brakes 

Avatar
gunswick | 7 years ago
8 likes

Squeaky chain
Rear derailleur needs indexing
Washing a wet lubed chain
Slow strava times in winter
Dog walkers with no leads or extendable leads
Broken spokes when you are setup tubeless

Avatar
ktache | 8 years ago
15 likes

Closed cycle route.  With no detour signs or advice.

Avatar
Man of Lard replied to ktache | 8 years ago
3 likes

ktache wrote:

Closed cycle route.  With no detour signs or advice.

Scottish Borders Council are great at this - and being a spectacularly sparsely populated area, the diversions are often 15+ miles extra with plenty of hills as well... The party of Danish cyclotourists I encountered when SBC closed NCN1 loved their diversion (only 9 miles and 300ft of ascent from where I intercepted them rather than having a 7 mile double back and 9mi/300ft)

Avatar
yourealwaysbe replied to ktache | 6 years ago
10 likes
ktache wrote:

Closed cycle route.  With no detour signs or advice.

"Cyclists dismount"

Avatar
earth replied to ktache | 5 years ago
1 like

ktache wrote:

Closed cycle route.  With no detour signs or advice.

 

Or as today, detour on the cycle path with only one sign saying where to leave but nothing saying where to rejoin.  Leading to a 20 minute safari around the urban jungle.

Avatar
grumpus replied to ktache | 5 years ago
2 likes

ktache wrote:

Closed cycle route.  With no detour signs or advice.

The other day I took a wrong turn on an unfamiliar estate and found myself in a amaze of twisty little passages, all alike.  So I switched on the satnav ... isn't that what everyone does?

Avatar
Grahamd | 8 years ago
15 likes

Finding the cafe closed...

Avatar
levermonkey replied to Grahamd | 5 years ago
0 likes

Grahamd wrote:

Finding the cafe closed...

Finding the Cafe open but they've run out of cake!

Avatar
Yorkshire wallet | 8 years ago
41 likes

Seem to be missing cars driven by twats. 

Avatar
HLaB replied to Yorkshire wallet | 6 years ago
2 likes
Yorkshire wallet wrote:

Seem to be missing cars driven by twats. 

Indeed, a lot of the stuff listed irritates me but I don't hate, I hate tw@ts that can kill another human being  7

Pages

Latest Comments