Help required. Sorry, another thread asking for opinions...

The good news is that with Fyffes now being bought over by Chiquita, you shouldn't suffer from any compatibility issues when switching bananas now. Also, if you can hold off until the end of the evening I hear there will be price cuts on previous models.

...or try something stylish, as featured on road.cc

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Banana-Guard-Holder-Carrier-Lunchbox/dp/B003JBU9...

I heard a rumour Rapha is developing one in partnership with Team Sky. It will be made out of carbon fibre, will come in various colour ways and will cost the reasonable sum of £50.

Froome is testing one now.

Do you even ride a Pirandello tho?

....I'll get my coat.

I assume you are under 40 as your diction indicates that you sat the diluted GCSE regime and therefore were never exposed to Faust, Camus and Martyn Samuel - poor you.

I would suggest carrying the banana in your shorts as this helps protect 'appearances' when your old boy has gone down the button mushroom route on a cooler day and will ensure a warm delivery. Although I have still to master the extraction and fuelling 'no handed' during a sportive - I think this was what David Millar was tweeting about this week when the 'prats' were wobbling all over the shop when taking their banana out whereas the 'pros' performed the task mid peloton with great aplomb during G-W.

secondly, we should talk colour. Green = Starchy and so good for slower release carbs (but you could get more benefit and taste experience from a raw potato) and yellow / flecks of brown = tasty and sweet.

and finally, the bananas should only ever be from the Windward Islands because I went to St Lucia on holiday in 1994 and Dr Doolittle was filmed there.

Sometimes more experienced banana carriers laugh at me on the club run because mine is a budget banana and much smaller than the others. Though personally I think if you can get by on budget bananas it makes you better in the long run, because when you finally upgrade to a bigger and more rigid banana you'll be flying.

Whether by hard research or happenchance you have come to the right place.
Cycling is a curious collection of disciplines but happily the need for individual thought can easily be removed from the equation, removing those stressful situations where thinking for yourself might cause unnecessary embarrassment by standing out from the crowd.
I am told that something called "the rules" is a good starting point although I have never bothered to read them myself, instead preferring to simply copy what I see, whether it's the clothes others wear, brands that they ride or the sayings they use.
Good luck in your quest with your banana and let us know how you get on; no one would want a fellow cyclist to suffer any undue torment when presented with such a dilemma.