“Is that Tom Dumoulin?” Horrified Zwift rider spots “guy taking a dump by the side of the road” in new real-world video – but Zwift says comfort break “being addressed”; Chris Boardman praised for call to “stop demonising cyclists” + more on the live blog

Alright, I reckon it’s about time we covered some proper, serious news on the live blog.

Like, err, this Zwift user who, while trying out the platform’s new real-world video routes, spotted a, ahem, Tom Dumoulin impersonator by the side of the road. As I said, serious stuff.

Last week, the indoor cycling giant introduced a new, more expensive subscription tier called Zwift Plus, offering personalised training plans as well as a ‘Zwift Video’ setting, similar to the real-world approach of the Zwift-owned Rouvy platform.

> Zwift introduces premium Zwift Plus subscription option with personalised coaching and real-world video routes

This Zwift Video feature enables users to watch their avatar toil through high-definition footage of actual, non-cartoon cycling routes, including the Col du Galibier, Mallorca’s Sa Calobra, and the Scottish Highlands. So it’s basically the same shed-based suffering, just more realistic.

And it was while virtually inching his way along a vast highway in Colorado that Sam Sky noticed, at the side of his laptop screen, someone crouching rather ominously at the side of the road:

Talk about Zone 2 (sorry). That might be the most disturbing thing ever seen from a turbo trainer. And that’s saying something.

“Zoom in on the green circle. I saw a guy taking a dump by the side of the road during my session this morning on the new videos,” Sam posted on Facebook, presumably in a bid to come to terms with the horrific scene his avatar had just witnessed.

But at least it’s given us some off-season conspiracy theories to sink our teeth into, as Sam’s fellow Zwift users praised the platform’s fondness for “realism” and debated the possible reasons behind the poor fella’s emergency roadside comfort break.

So far, we’ve had the classic ‘too many energy gels’ (we’ve all been there), a questionable bid to shed some weight before the final climb, or maybe, just maybe Tom Dumoulin was just on holiday in Colorado and decided to recreate his classic Giro antics for the Zwift mobile as it passed. All great suggestions.

But this being Zwift, there’s always going to be one smart alec criticising poor traumatised Sam’s indoor training efforts.

“If you’ve got time to take notice of this, you don’t train hard enough!” said Marcel. Have a day off, mate.

Because we’re proper, serious journalists, we got in touch with Zwift to ask them about their surprise comfort breaker and, you’ll be saddened to hear, they’re taking action.

“We’re aware that the screenshot has been shared,” a spokesperson for the company told us. “This is being addressed today. I’m sure that some readers may be slightly disappointed…”

Too right we are. Spoilsports.

Last week, you may remember, the Spectator published a column claiming England’s active travel commissioner Chris Boardman was trying to “let cyclists off the hook”.

In his column, Ross Clark accused Boardman’s open letter to the Times, which argued that the police should prioritise motoring offences over those committed by people on bikes, of “bleating” and ignoring dangerous cycling on pavements.

Clark also urged the government to give the active travel commissioner role to a pedestrian next time, “rather than an Olympic cyclist” (conveniently ignoring Boardman’s decades of road safety campaigning in the process).

> Chris Boardman accused of “letting cyclists off the hook” and “bleating” bout two-tonne vehicles, as columnist urges government to give active travel role to a “pedestrian next time, rather than an Olympic cyclist”

Just a few days after Clark’s questionable attack, the Spectator (to be fair to it) has decided to give Boardman the chance to put his view across and, in his own words, “push the facts to the front”.

In the column, titled ‘It’s time to stop demonising cyclists’, Boardman – who was also forced to deal with Richard Madeley’s fact-free approach on Good Morning Britain last week – began by describing the latest outrage concerning cyclists on Oxford Street, before criticising Clark’s claim that he was letting cyclists off the hook by calling for motoring offences to be prioritised.

“His inference is wrong; I agree that people cycling illegally should be challenged. I also think we can do better than demonising a group of people in this way,” Boardman wrote.

“We all want the same things when it comes to road safety… We should condemn cyclists who speed past pedestrians on the pavement. It’s at best selfish, and at worst, it’s dangerous. Making others feel unsafe is unacceptable. The law should apply to everyone equally.”

> “Pedestrianisation should not come at the expense of active travel”: 600 cyclists flout Oxford Street bike ban in “mass trespass” to call for safe cycle lanes

However, Boardman then pointed out that “there’s an important difference between condemning the behaviour of individuals, and because of their behaviour, condemning an entire group of people”.

“We don’t for example infer boy racers represent all drivers,” he wrote, noting that we all use different forms of transport. “The dogged determination of some to turn how people travel into a tribal identity they can rally against is absurd.

“We all, reluctantly, understand that the police can’t pursue everyone who breaks the law. They simply don’t have the resources, so difficult choices must be made about which offences they should prioritise. I want those choices to be guided by the evidence about where the greatest danger lies.

“And that evidence is clear. Nearly 30,000 people were killed or seriously injured on Britain’s roads last year – around one person every 17 minutes. Behind each number is a person, with a family. My mother was one of the people featured in those statistics. She was crushed to death by a driver who had been texting. So, when I talk about road danger, I’m not making an abstract argument. It’s painfully personal for me.

“This doesn’t excuse someone cycling dangerously, but it does mean that when the police have to choose between focusing on speeding, texting drivers or people riding a bicycle on the pavement, I want them to look first at the things which have the potential to cause the most harm to others.

“Cars are 100 times heaver and twice as fast as a bicycle. That’s not, as Ross Clark implied, favouritism, it’s physics.”

Boardman then questioned the direction of the media and public’s anger when it comes to road safety. For example, instead of being viewed as an effective method to reduce the number of collisions on the road, “speed limits have become one of the great controversies of modern British life”.

“It seems the freedom to break the law without being caught is something we are rather attached to. Personally, I think railing against the measures that save lives and saves families from grief, is what we should be outraged about,” Boardman wrote.

“Commentators who demand tougher action against cyclists, while ignoring the practical actions we could take elsewhere to tackle far greater risks, are in my view, part of the problem.

“If we did as some journalists suggested and diverted scarce police resources away from things that kill and seriously injure the most people, we will make our roads less safe and see more lives devastated by crashes. Outrage makes headlines. It doesn’t, if wrongly focused, improve public safety.”

> Good Morning Britain hosts repeatedly (and wrongly) claim Dutch cyclists are required to have licence plates and insurance… only to be corrected by Chris Boardman minutes later

The active travel commissioner’s plea for some sense and nuance in the road safety debate was praised by Dr Robert Davis, the chair of the Road Danger Reduction Forum.

“Glad that Chris Boardman is (mildly) correcting the wave of bigotry against all cyclists,” he posted. “Giving him a short space to do so is the least the Spectator can do given how it has housed anti-cycling bigotry.”

“Chris wants badly behaved cyclists to be punished, but he wants those whose bad behaviour has the most impact on others to be dealt with first,” said another social media user.

“When drivers are perfectly behaved then police resources can be switched to policing cyclists. It will be a while.”

However, not everyone was pleased with Boardman’s much-needed intervention, with the former pro cyclist’s column even attracting calls for the police to devote more resources to, wait for it, confiscating bikes from “lawless” cyclists.

“Nobody is saying that the police shouldn’t crack down on reckless or dangerous driving,” transport campaigner John Stewart tweeted. “But lawless cycling needs to be dealt with as well. A £1,000 fine and confiscation of the bike would soon stop the reckless cycling that happens daily.”

Talk about missing the point…

“Bring it on,” replied Simon Deakin. “We’ll be fining dangerous drivers the same and confiscating their cars too? Because it’s about making sure everyone works to the same rules, right?” Right?

A week and a half on from the Tour de France’s swanky route presentation in Paris, today marks the Giro d’Italia’s turn to unveil its plans for 2027, in Rome’s Auditorium Parco della Musica Ennio Morricone (true to form, it’s not quite as fancy as its French counterpart, but there are still pro cyclists standing awkwardly on a stage with a microphone, so it ticks the key boxes).

The women’s race was first up and, judging by the route at least, it looks set to be a corker. While the Tour de France Femmes route for 2027 has been criticised due to a lack of high mountain passes, there are no such issues for the Italian grand tour, which will feature three massive GC in the Alps and a potentially decisive uphill 11km time trial.

Kicking off in Viareggio on Saturday 29 May, the Giro d’Italia Women – won in dramatic fashion this year by Demi Vollering – will begin with a lumpy route around the Tuscan seaside town, before stage two heads north for another up-and-down day to Genoa.

If they’ve struggled on the opening hilly stages, the pure sprinters will finally get their chance on stages three and five. In-between, however, they’ll have to survive a brutish fourth stage from Credaro to Passo della Presolana, featuring four long, hard climbs and a tough ascent to the finish, averaging 5.4 per cent over its 11.7km.

Stage six, from Bergamo (my favourite Italian city, in case you were wondering) to Madesimo-Passo dello Spluga will be another big GC day, taking the riders over the Passo San Marco – at 1,987m the highest point of the race – before an 18.9km slog to the line.

One final chance for the sprinters in Lombardy will then precede an explosive, tantalising final weekend, kicking off with a mountain time trial on Valdigne, an 11km uphill drag which will favour the stronger climbers.

And if the pink jersey isn’t wrapped up by then, stage nine – dubbed the ‘Monte Bianco stage’ – will blow things apart, packing in four massive Alpine climbs, 3,950m in elevation over its 132km, and featuring (cruelly) a descent and flat run-in. Expect fireworks.

Whatever you think about the Tour Femmes in 2027, I reckon your annual quota of big mountain stages in grand tours has now been met, don’t you?

I know it’s a few days late, but this is a cracking satirical effort by Oxford councillor Emily Kerr:

Why yes I AM reprising the classic “dressed as a cycle lane to scare people” outfit for Halloween.

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— Cllr Emily Kerr 💚 (@emilykerr36.bsky.social) October 31, 2026 at 4:57 PM

Here’s some more footage of last Friday’s Critical Mass ride in London, which you may have heard ended up on Oxford Street. I’m sure there wasn’t much to report…

 

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