[David9694]

A new catch-all Tea Shop thread for those miscellaneous new stories that don’t quite fit with parking, crashing into buildings or trapped/prisoners in their homes. 

Topic

[brooksby]

Did someone say Allo, allo?

Did someone say Allo, allo?

[David9694]

Or a Jacques Cousteau accent?

Or a Jacques Cousteau accent?

Bois de Boulogne was my guess for a location.

Can anyone make out le caption?

[SimoninSpalding]

I frequently upset other road
I frequently upset other road users by driving at 30mph in a 30 zone…

[chrisonabike]

You should have say that it

You should have say that it was a curious picture but then reminded them of e.g. Pierre Curie being killed by a cart (although this was considered distracted walking in part).  Then point out that there are a lot more carts now with a lot more horsepower and speed.  But the drivers are still humans.

Alternatively you could connect this with the Matthew Parris / Rod Liddle “banter” and compared this to a lynching postcard.  But then everyone would definitely know you were a nutter and you’d probably get blocked.

[David9694]

No-one think I’m over

No-one think I’m over-reacting here? Sense of humour failure? 

it’s the drip-drip, oh so subtle creeping nature of this sort of thing that both bothers me, and makes it harder to tackle. 

[Mungecrundle]

I sort of imagined the Horse
I sort of imagined the Horse drawn carriage was on a tree lined Parisian boulevard given the original caption and wanted to create a juxtaposition which hilights the particular un-necessity of driving large SUVs in urban environments, the special incompetence demonstrated in managing to turn them upside down and their existential threat to cyclists and pedestrians in such an environment.

(Some of those words need to be said in a posh art critic type Brian Sewell voice).

[chrisonabike]

Sorry Mate, Horse Didn’t See

Sorry Mate, Horse Didn’t See You.  Although it does seem to wearing tinted blinkers – hope they’re carriageway-legal.

Alternatively – “although a lifelong careful driver, my client was momentarily and unavoidably distracted when their postillion was struck by lightning…”

[David9694]

Why only urban? 

Why only urban? 

[Mungecrundle]

Something like this?
Something like this?

[David9694]

That would have been a

That would have been a suitably jocular comeback, actually.  After all the driver that knocked me off in 2007 was female. 

[Mungecrundle]

I trust you were too much of
I trust you were too much of a gentleman to turn that particular image into a comment about lady drivers…

[David9694]

This was posted on one local

This was posted on one local group I belong to.  I couldn’t get the admin or FB to remove it and the poster childishly dug her heels in when challenged. We went through the usual “ha ha ha I’m a cyclist too”, “can’t you take a joke” “you’re controlling” until she bailed out.  No, your “joke” about someone getting injured isn’t landing with me.

A few days ago, I had someone this same group innocuously, but selectively posting the anti-cycling rantings of the New Forest Court of Verderers, the most crank-snapping, absurd, jumped-up and parochial bunch you can imagine.  If you’re recovering from an illness, you could do worse than bring up their minutes, after you’ve drunk your fill of random one and two star Tripadvisor reviews. 

I get the words, we sometimes make jokes about that on here, but the image and the words…thanks, lady for making the roads a slightly more shitty and dangerous place for VRUs. 

[ShutTheFrontDawes]

Exactly, some cars have much
Exactly, some cars have much better systems than others. There is no reason why the Kona shouldn’t be able to apply engine braking (or whatever the equivalent on an electric vehicle is called, and it really is VERY effective if you fully lift off) but instead I get a stupid fucking bong as though it’s up to me to limit the speed when the speed limiter is engaged. I find it so infuriating. I do love how effectively the CC knocks the speed down like you say though.

[IanMSpencer]

I had a limiter on a 1999

I had a limiter on a 1999 Mercedes, and that could only use engine braking to hold the speed. On my 2012 they integrated it with the ABS/stability control system and now it will apply brakes to hold the speed. When approaching a speed limit it is easy to gently knock it down in 5s or 1s to hit the new limit bang on the line – which of course pisses off drivers behind who think that you have a few hundred meters of allowance so you shouldn’t start braking until some point after the limit sign (but before any obvious speed cameras of course).

[ShutTheFrontDawes]

My car (Hyundai Kona) has a
My car (Hyundai Kona) has a speed limiter and cruise control but the minimum speed that may be set is 20mph – I have no idea why. Also the CC is pretty good at keeping the car at 20 and doesn’t let the speed come up when you go downhill for example, but the speed limiter readily allows the speed to come up and will bong at you when more than 2mph over the set speed. The car is electric and is fully capable of slowing itself down. The speed limiter is just crap and I wish it were better.

[Author]

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