Best way of attracting female cyclists

One nice chap challenged me to hop on behind him when overtaking me after Elephant & Castle, which I did (impressively considering it was about 12am, he was pretty nippy, and my bike isn't the poshest) and my rear light promptly fell off as I went over a drain crater, meaning I had to stop and rescue it. I like to think it might have been true love had the roads been a little better...

A mini pump down the front of your shorts?

Pheromone spray: Apply it very liberally, a whole can, and then ignite it, your screams should attract the attention of females. It could also kick in their mothering instinct well that or the smell of cooking bacon as your flesh burns might make them hungry and even the veggies can warm up their lentil soup on you. Good luck with the ladies.

The one guy I've seen riding regularly at Richmond Park always surrounded by pretty girls is Nasty Nick from Big Brother first series.

Make of that what you will!

"If you're reading this my friend, please try something new, as the chances of you having sex ever again are very unlikely"

That's a bit harsh. Those arm exercises are bound to come in useful...

Pretty straightforward solution:
1. Remove lycra.
2. Go to passtime no. 2, beer.

Clothes put on between 1 and 2 is advisable.

Sounds like you're all playing hard to get, but would really like him to call you....

I find treating them NO different to male cyclists doesn't work, they just think I'm gay.....

Nothing says "good girl" like a firm pat on the buttocks...

...or so my Dad tells me.

What an Amateur!

We all know the way you attract female cyclist is by drawing a knob in chalk on your left thigh. Bum pinch is optional.