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‘Oh no, Mr Squirrel!’ or talking to yourself on rides

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  • October 9, 2016 at 5:50 pm #26363
    Leviathan

    Some of us ride alone, and with no one to talk to on a long ride one tends to concoct many to do lists and enraged emails which are never sent. Occasionally some words slip out when I see a dead critter like ‘Oh no, Mr Squirrel!’ or insert Mrs Squirrel, Mr Hedgehog,  Mr Magpie, even Mr Badger.

    Another of my favourites is ‘Make your mind up, MAKE YOUR MIND UP!’ said to cars sticking their noses out of side streets.

    What other little phrases do you say to yourself/other road users?

     

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  • October 19, 2018 at 10:01 am #879589
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    nniff

    My calm-down-tune is “Singing

    My calm-down-tune is “Singing in the rain” – if I find it very therapeutic if the traffic is oppressive.  Similarly, when the sun’s out and you’re bowling along – nothing better.

    Lots of “Hello, horse”.  Cows for some reason get “Ey up, beasts”.

    I will resist the $ thing.  I know I’d doomed the next time I conscously see one though.

     

    October 19, 2018 at 9:40 am #879587
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    Kendalred

    For no reason whatsoever I

    For no reason whatsoever I had ‘I can’t go back to savoury now’ by John Shuttleworth going round my head on yesterday afternoon’s commute.

    Bizarre.

    The biggest non-human hazard on my commute – usually Herdwick sheep, ambling out of the way with all the time in the world. A loud ‘come on then!’ usually does the trick eventually.

    October 19, 2018 at 8:32 am #879585
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    Alessandro

    I was going round Dalmeny

    I was going round Dalmeny Estate this morning in the north west of Edinburgh and it was dark so, naturally, I ended up started singing (in my head) Dalmey in the Dark to the tune of Springsteen’s Dancing in the Dark. 

    The only noise I made in the hour or so that I was out was a pretend gun noise to get a nye of pheasants (yes, I did have to google what a group of pheasants is called) to move out of the way. Daft buggers. 

    October 14, 2018 at 12:25 pm #879583
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    StraelGuy

    Finally, this thread has been

    Finally, this thread has been saved by our resident Road.cc ‘Spokesman for squirrel related information’ yes.

    October 14, 2018 at 11:48 am #879581
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    hawkinspeter

    Thanks for resurrecting this

    Thanks for resurrecting this thread – I can’t believe I hadn’t commented on it before now.

    I usually just say to myself “who’s eating this avocado?”

     

     

    October 14, 2018 at 11:06 am #879579
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    ktache

    I have found myself, when

    I have found myself, when encountering those large, glossy black birds, to semi sing, “To orangey for crows…”

     

    October 19, 2016 at 9:38 pm #879577
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    Shades

    Just switched to my winter

    Just switched to my winter ‘green lane’ commuting route.  Normally loads of lazy pheasants running in front of the bike with me shouting, “Take-off!”

    October 19, 2016 at 7:07 pm #879575
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    Leviathan
    Danger Dicko wrote:
    I commentate on myself as if I’m in a pro race.

    The crowd gasp at Cocker’s masterful control of the bicycle,
    skillfully avoiding the dog turd outside the corner shop.

    October 19, 2016 at 10:55 am #879573
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    themartincox

    Bonjour Mr Cow

    Bonjour Mr Cow

     

    or “boeuf” – but oddly, this only gets uttered when I see French cows, obviously UK cows wouldnt understand

    October 19, 2016 at 10:43 am #879571
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    Anonymous

    I say nothing……just in

    I say nothing……just in case there’s someone silently taking a wheel behind me. Only good manners to look behind before you let rip though.

    I tend to daydream on solo rides. A mile will pass and suddenly I’ll realise that I’ve not paid any attention at all. or it felt like it. Obviously I must somehow have been paying attention but my mind will be wandering off to other things I want to do sometimes, like build an arcade cabinet.

    October 19, 2016 at 9:47 am #879569
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    Danger Dicko

    I commentate on myself as if

    I commentate on myself as if I’m in a pro race.

    October 18, 2016 at 7:28 am #879567
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    hennie

    MrMajic]

    MrMajic wrote:
    stem wrote:
    [quote=MrMajic]

    I also make a “kerching” cash register sound when I make a perfect straight line on  the “S” of “SLOW” because that makes a $. But I do feel guilty because one should really cross on the horizontal section of the “L” as this the least amount of (slippery) paint to cross.

    Oh god, I hope I forget this before I ride next.

    So you won’t thank me for pointing out that three $ in a row (i.e. not missing one) is a big win. Three yellow ones (the S in BUS STOP) uninterrupted is the jackpot.  

    [/quote

    Oh boy, this new dollar thing is here to stay. Bit like changing the toilet roll round when people leave it dangling out the back  Once you start, there’s no going back!

     

    October 16, 2016 at 10:51 pm #879565
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    RMurphy195

    “Mint Sauce” to sheep

    “Mint Sauce” to sheep

    “Mustard” to cows

    “Do you know what the indicator stalk is for” to – guess who!

    The all-too-often “Aaaaarrgh”angel (I’m making an effort to moderate my language in case I forget myself in front of my grandson)

    October 16, 2016 at 8:40 pm #879563
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    matthewn5

    Errrmmm… ‘No! Nooo! thank

    Errrmmm… ‘No! Nooo! thank you!’ to cars that might drive out in front of me

    ‘Come on bike, win the Tour!’ when climbing out of the saddle

    And my all time favourite: ‘spin don’t lug’

    Plus plenty of advice to myself ‘come ON’, the perennial ‘shut up legs’ etc.

    And a lot of ‘hello sparrow/magpie/cows’ etc

    Plus ‘good morning’ to cyclists overtaking, or on the occasion that I overtake others – joggers too, because otherwise they might step out into the road.

    October 15, 2016 at 7:08 pm #879561
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    MrMajic
    stem wrote:
    MrMajic wrote:
    I also make a “kerching” cash register sound when I make a perfect straight line on  the “S” of “SLOW” because that makes a $. But I do feel guilty because one should really cross on the horizontal section of the “L” as this the least amount of (slippery) paint to cross.

    Oh god, I hope I forget this before I ride next.

    So you won’t thank me for pointing out that three $ in a row (i.e. not missing one) is a big win. Three yellow ones (the S in BUS STOP) uninterrupted is the jackpot.  

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