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Online doping confession generator makes it easier than ever to get things off your chest

Got a secret you want to share with the cycling world but having trouble finding the right words? Worry no longer...

Have recent events in the cycling world made you examine your conscience? Do you have a secret you need to share but you just don't know how to go about unburdening yourself? Fret no longer. Sorry I Doped is an online doping confession generator that you can customise to produce a tailor-made admission of past transgressions, avoiding the need to pay a ghostwriter to do it for you wrestle with how best to express your heartfelt apology.

Sorry I Doped is brought to you by W&D Racing/NYC Velo.

Simon joined road.cc as news editor in 2009 and is now the site’s community editor, acting as a link between the team producing the content and our readers. A law and languages graduate, published translator and former retail analyst, he has reported on issues as diverse as cycling-related court cases, anti-doping investigations, the latest developments in the bike industry and the sport’s biggest races. Now back in London full-time after 15 years living in Oxford and Cambridge, he loves cycling along the Thames but misses having his former riding buddy, Elodie the miniature schnauzer, in the basket in front of him.

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11 comments

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onlyonediane | 11 years ago
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Gkam, for the record PCP is an opportunistic infection commonly seen in late presenters with HIV. I believe you must of meant TCP to keep clean your injection sites clean? Me I still in denial and the use of performance related drugs has never been used by good honest decent folk.

Therefore I have nothing to apologise for!

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Pantera_Standish | 11 years ago
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Dear sponsors:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with rhinoceros horn. I wanted to use these products because I thought everyone else was doing it. I took these products between January 2005 and February 2005.

I don't care what anyone thinks about my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

Sincerely,
Neil eethere

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CycleGringo | 11 years ago
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Dear friends, family, teammates, fans, sponsors, and creditors:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with EPO, blood transfusions, cortisone, testosterone, Clenbuterol, Actovegin, and rhinoceros horn. I wanted to use these products because I was driven by unbridled ambition to win at any cost. I took these products between January 2008 and September 2012.

I deeply regret, take responsibility for, hope that others can learn from, am truly sorry for, and don't care what anyone thinks about my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

Sincerely,
Alec

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Holimoli | 11 years ago
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Dear friends, family, and fans:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with EPO, blood transfusions, cortisone, testosterone, and Actovegin. I did not want to use these products but I thought everyone else was doing it. I took these products between June 1995 and December 2005.

I feel ashamed of, take responsibility for, and am truly sorry for my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

However, I promise that I was clean when I won Paris-Roubaix. My current relationship to Michele Ferrari is purely platonic. I have to carry two phones in case two people want to get hold of me simultaneously. My hematocrit is naturally 49.9. Oh, and the vials in my fridge are for my wife's anaemia due to a menstrual condition. Honest.

Sincerely,
Edgar A Poe

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red snapper | 11 years ago
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Dear Whoever:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my future. I admit to doping with EPO, blood transfusions, cortisone, testosterone, Clenbuterol, Actovegin, rhinoceros horn, and PCP. I want to use these products because I am driven by unbridled ambition to win at any cost. I will take these products between January 2013 and January 2014 and smoke you all.

I don't care what anyone thinks about my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

Anyone got any needles?

Sincerely,
Tyler Something

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andyspaceman | 11 years ago
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Dear friends, family, and fans:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with EPO, and rhinoceros horn. I wanted to use these products because I was driven by unbridled ambition to win at any cost. I took these products between July 1999 and July 2006.

I don't care what anyone thinks about my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

Hell, my wife loved it. The fact that I could be a big-earning super-domestique by day and a stallion by night was a winner for everyone. They should legalize that s***.

Sincerely,

Archibald Nonchelance

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giff77 | 11 years ago
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Dear friends, family, and fans:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with EPO, blood transfusions, testosterone, Clenbuterol, and PCP. I wanted to use these products because I was driven by unbridled ambition to win at any cost. I took these products between January 1987 and July 2001.

I don't care what anyone thinks about my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

Sincerely,
Bertie Bates
 19

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carlosjenno | 11 years ago
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Dear creditors:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with EPO, blood transfusions, cortisone, testosterone, Clenbuterol, Actovegin, rhinoceros horn, and PCP. I did not want to use these products but I was driven by unbridled ambition to win at any cost. I took these products between November 2011 and December 2011.

I deeply regret and feel ashamed of my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

I appear to have grown a line of hairy tits up my back and my skin has turned green. Omega Pharma have said they're interested in experimenting on me and think that I may provice a cure for ebola virus.

Sincerely,
Vlad the Impaler

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Gkam84 | 11 years ago
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Dear friends, family, teammates, fans, sponsors, and creditors:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with EPO, blood transfusions, cortisone, testosterone, Clenbuterol, Actovegin, rhinoceros horn, and PCP. I did not want to use these products but I was driven by unbridled ambition to win at any cost. I took these products between May 1984 and November 2012.

I deeply regret, feel ashamed of, take responsibility for, hope that others can learn from, am truly sorry for, and don't care what anyone thinks about my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

Sincerely,
Gkam84

I did everything from my birth until yesterday, I regret it all and decided to give up.........yeah right, Lance is still supplying me  19

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karlowen | 11 years ago
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In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with everything i could lay my hands on.

I wanted to use these products and would eat a fellow cyclist if i believed it would make me faster, and then force the rest of my team to do the same in pursuit of my own goals.

The UCI didn't care and practically encouraged me to behave in this manner.

I took these products between the start of time and wayyyy after Pat's ridiculous cut off date.

I don't care what anyone thinks about my actions as i've got millions of dollars.

Sincerely,
Lance

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notfastenough | 11 years ago
0 likes

Fantabulous.

"Dear friends, family, teammates, fans, sponsors, and creditors:

In the wake of recent events in the world of cycling, I can no longer hide my past. I admit to doping with EPO, blood transfusions, cortisone, testosterone, Clenbuterol, Actovegin, rhinoceros horn, and PCP. I wanted to use these products because I was driven by unbridled ambition to win at any cost. I took these products between June 1919 and August 2009.

I don't care what anyone thinks about my actions and I hope that my confession can help bring positive change to the sport that we all love so much.

So long, and thanks for all the cash.

Sincerely,
Spear Dopestrong"

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