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18 things that cyclists hate — duff rides you should try and avoid

We love cycling but just occasionally it all goes horribly wrong

We love cycling. No, we really love cycling, and we like to dwell on the positive whenever possible. But sometimes, just sometimes, it can be – what’s the word? – challenging.

Here are 18 things that we reckon every cyclist hates. Do you agree?

1 Clicking down a gear, only to find out you’re already in the lowest gear
That’s bad. Really bad.

2 Thinking you’re at the top of the hill, then discovering you aren’t
What, there’s more? How much more? Oh no!

3 The bonk
Blowing up, the hunger knock, hitting the wall… When you’re out of energy, it feels like the end of the world.

4 Creaks and squeaks

13Bikes Intuition Beta - bottom bracket

Is it the headset? The bottom bracket? The saddle rails? Your knees?

You can sometimes go around the whole bike systematically eliminating each individual component as the source of a mysterious noise until there are none left. And it still bloody creaks.

5 Red traffic lights
They’re especially bad if they’re at the bottom of a hill. All that momentum gone in a flash. Grrr!

6 Cold fingers
Still, it’s not as bad as the feeling of cold fingers coming back to life. That’s pure evil.

7 Punctures
It goes without saying, really.

Rema Tip Top TT02 repair kit

8 You attack as hard as you can, check over your shoulder to see how much of a gap you have… and they’re still on your wheel
Bollocks.

9 Forgetting you’re clipped in until it’s too late
Don’t even try to make out it didn’t hurt. You’re fooling no one.

10 Your light goes out
You knew you should have recharged it, didn’t you?

Cateye Rapid 3 front

11 It starts to rain the moment you put your kit on
You had nice weather all morning too. Also, while we’re at it: needing to use the toilet as soon as you put your bibs on.

12 Putting on wet kit for your commute home
It rained on the way into work this morning and the seatpad is still soggy. Urgh!

13 Unacknowledged waves
You wave or nod at a cyclist coming the other way and they don’t do it back. Rude!

14 Tyre sidewall splitting 
The first you feel is a strange knocking coming from either the fork or the chainstays. If you’re really unlucky, within a few seconds you’ll hear a sound like a gunshot. That’s the inner tube exploding. Now you’re in trouble.

15 Getting dropped
From beginner to World Champion, it hurts just the same.

16 Running out of drink

Camelbak Podium water bottle.jpg

This usually happens when you’re in the back of beyond, rarely when there’s a service station just around the corner.

17 The turbo

Elite Real Axiom Trainer - riding

A lot of us do it, but only as a means to an end. You put up with the short-term pain for the long-term fitness gains. But you know there are some lunatics who actually enjoy it?

18 Getting caught in the rain

Marrakech Atlas Etape Still Images4

This usually happens just after you’ve cleaned your bike, when you’re wearing a white jersey, or on the day you forgot your waterproof. Or all three.

Over to you. What did we miss? Don’t hold back now!

Mat has been in cycling media since 1996, on titles including BikeRadar, Total Bike, Total Mountain Bike, What Mountain Bike and Mountain Biking UK, and he has been editor of 220 Triathlon and Cycling Plus. Mat has been road.cc technical editor for over a decade, testing bikes, fettling the latest kit, and trying out the most up-to-the-minute clothing. He has won his category in Ironman UK 70.3 and finished on the podium in both marathons he has run. Mat is a Cambridge graduate who did a post-grad in magazine journalism, and he is a winner of the Cycling Media Award for Specialist Online Writer. Now over 50, he's riding road and gravel bikes most days for fun and fitness rather than training for competitions.

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140 comments

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ridein | 5 years ago
0 likes

There is no fun riding with a racist ride leader on a club ride who only knows 3 ride routes.

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TheFamilyDog | 5 years ago
5 likes

Setting off on the work commute and thinking “wow I am really flying today” only to realise after 2miles that I have left my backpack on the kitchen table.

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vonhelmet | 5 years ago
0 likes

Traffic lights on a hill, when I’m on my single speed. Yeah, I just love hill starting that bad boy.

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Mungecrundle | 5 years ago
2 likes

When the weather is really crap and you turn out for the weekly club ride hoping that nobody else bothers to turn up. And then some other stupid bastard does turn up and then you have to go for a cycle ride instead of sloping off back to bed or a few hours of computer gaming in the warm.

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peted76 | 5 years ago
0 likes

Forgetting to press start on your garmin.. plus numbers; 1,4,6,8,10,13 & 16.. was last weeks ride for me! 

 

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henrypurcell | 5 years ago
2 likes

Narrow uphill contraflows

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Peter Scott | 5 years ago
2 likes

You spot a rider a few hundred metres ahead. You ride hard and start to catch up. Just before you get to him, so you can overtake and say 'Morning', he turns off onto a side road.

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RoadYeti | 5 years ago
0 likes

Strava.....   for anything other than finding you when you've crashed out alone on the road or trail and don't show up for dinner   :  )

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froze | 5 years ago
0 likes

A lot of that stuff that some of you listed and was on the list that started the article is stuff that shouldn't be happening on a ride if your pre and post checking your bike, stuff like sidewall separation, squeeking chain, improperly indexed derailleur, etc should have been taken care of before your next ride by discovering it sooner.  Another issue mentioned was preparing for your ride properly, not enough water? really?  I always take more than I need, but  that's because I ride without a map and if I get lost well I might need extra water,  And if I have all the water I can carry but the likely hood of running out exists then I also, and always, carry cash in case I need to buy water and/or food.  Rain? there is always the weather information available either on your computer or phone, but granted depending on where you live it could rain unexpectedly, but those types of rain are usually fast and done in 5 minutes so it's no big deal.  As far as buying something like a pump that takes 2000 (exaggeration I'm sure) strokes? well that sort of thing should have been checked out on the internet first before you bought such a piece of crap.  Not knowing how to fix a flat...well that's on you!

So really the only 3 things I really hate is:

1) It's raining or snowing and now I have to ride the trainer which I hate so much I usually just don't bother riding on it! 

2) The other thing I really hate is something called rolling coal, this is when a diesel pickup goes by you and the moron driving floors it and throws a switch engulfing you in a black cloud of choking exhaust. 

3) The only other thing I hate is fellow cyclists riding their bikes with no regard to safety, rules and laws of the road, giving all us law abidding riders a bad rap to motorists who disrepect all of us because of those actions...by more then a few riders.

Sometimes I run into a person that has a flat and either was trying to be extra lightweight and didn't pack anything to fix a flat with (duh) or simply doesn't know how (another duh), doesn't really bother me to stop and lend a hand.  In the process of lending a hand I teach them how to do it and what to buy so they can be more prepared next time, in fact I show them my entire contents of my seat bag and explain why I carry it and what it can be used for, and tell them which stuff is very important to carry and which stuff is optional so they can make up their own minds if they think the optional stuff is important to them or not.

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daviddb | 5 years ago
2 likes

Numb nuts

 

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seven | 5 years ago
0 likes

Half-wheeling

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Organon | 5 years ago
7 likes

Old threads just popping up in the 'What's hot' section.

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lycraConflagrant | 5 years ago
0 likes

when you head out on a winter ride, fully kitted up in thermal bib tights, top base layer, etc and outer jacket and as soon as you get your arse on the seat you realize you forgot your chamois

 

(this only occurs if your tights aren't padded, of course)

 

WEAR PADDED TIGHTS PEOPLE

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hawkinspeter | 5 years ago
0 likes

When you try to seize the means of production, but then spot a bike shop selling cheap bike parts.

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ConcordeCX replied to littlegermanboy | 6 years ago
2 likes

littlegermanboy wrote:

Something that does slightly get my goat: all these people at sportives pushing their bikes to/from the car park/wherever, when it would be quicker and easier to ride. I mean... why? 

it's cooler like this:

 

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seven replied to 700c | 5 years ago
0 likes
700c wrote:

Ah 6. The pain of defrosting fingers is the absolute worst! 

I used to feel sick and dizzy as they warmed up after a frosty commute  

After stupidly wearing a pair of 3/4 bibs on a boxing day ten, during which the temperature took a severe turn for the worse, I once had the fun of having to thaw both feet, ankles and shins from complete numbness. Definitely some of the worst pain I've ever experienced.

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Cyclax Maximus replied to mingmong | 5 years ago
0 likes

mingmong wrote:

Snot expulsion clearance failure

Ho Ho. I can certainly identify with that !

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CygnusX1 replied to Organon | 5 years ago
7 likes
Organon wrote:

Old threads just popping up in the 'What's hot' section.

People commenting on that they hate old threads popping up on the what's hot section so that the thread keeps popping up on the what's hot section  1

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Mungecrundle replied to CygnusX1 | 5 years ago
1 like
CygnusX1 wrote:
Organon wrote:

Old threads just popping up in the 'What's hot' section.

People commenting on that they hate old threads popping up on the what's hot section so that the thread keeps popping up on the what's hot section  1

Couldn't agree more.

Some people just don't know when to leave it.

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hawkinspeter replied to Mungecrundle | 5 years ago
1 like

Mungecrundle wrote:
CygnusX1 wrote:
Organon wrote:

Old threads just popping up in the 'What's hot' section.

People commenting on that they hate old threads popping up on the what's hot section so that the thread keeps popping up on the what's hot section  1

Couldn't agree more. Some people just don't know when to leave it.

^ This

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hawkinspeter replied to hawkinspeter | 3 years ago
3 likes

hawkinspeter wrote:

Mungecrundle wrote:
CygnusX1 wrote:
Organon wrote:

Old threads just popping up in the 'What's hot' section.

People commenting on that they hate old threads popping up on the what's hot section so that the thread keeps popping up on the what's hot section  1

Couldn't agree more. Some people just don't know when to leave it.

^ This

Also, having your area downgraded from Covid Tier 3 to Covid Tier 2, but realising that one of your favourite cycling route crosses into South Glos which stays in Tier 3.

(Thought I'd put something Covid related for historical interest in a few years time when this thread pops up again)

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TheBillder replied to hawkinspeter | 3 years ago
1 like

Stay away from Gloucs except for essential banjo repairs.

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hawkinspeter replied to hawkinspeter | 2 years ago
3 likes

hawkinspeter wrote:

hawkinspeter wrote:

Mungecrundle wrote:
CygnusX1 wrote:
Organon wrote:

Old threads just popping up in the 'What's hot' section.

People commenting on that they hate old threads popping up on the what's hot section so that the thread keeps popping up on the what's hot section  1

Couldn't agree more. Some people just don't know when to leave it.

^ This

Also, having your area downgraded from Covid Tier 3 to Covid Tier 2, but realising that one of your favourite cycling route crosses into South Glos which stays in Tier 3.

(Thought I'd put something Covid related for historical interest in a few years time when this thread pops up again)

When you've slavishly followed all the Covid restrictions and then find out that the people that made the rules were just ignoring them, holding parties and then lying to parliament about it, but then Russia invades Ukraine and the Tories are too worried to find a replacement for Boris who hasn't also been breaking the rules. (April 2022)

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stomec replied to hawkinspeter | 2 years ago
3 likes

hawkinspeter wrote:

hawkinspeter wrote:

hawkinspeter wrote:

Mungecrundle wrote:
CygnusX1 wrote:
Organon wrote:

Old threads just popping up in the 'What's hot' section.

People commenting on that they hate old threads popping up on the what's hot section so that the thread keeps popping up on the what's hot section  1

Couldn't agree more. Some people just don't know when to leave it.

^ This

Also, having your area downgraded from Covid Tier 3 to Covid Tier 2, but realising that one of your favourite cycling route crosses into South Glos which stays in Tier 3.

(Thought I'd put something Covid related for historical interest in a few years time when this thread pops up again)

When you've slavishly followed all the Covid restrictions and then find out that the people that made the rules were just ignoring them, holding parties and then lying to parliament about it, but then Russia invades Ukraine and the Tories are too worried to find a replacement for Boris who hasn't also been breaking the rules. (April 2022)

And when the government further tries to distract from the situation by promoting an inhuman plan to deport traumatised asylum seekers to a county which a few months ago the same government was criticising for human rights abuses. At an eye watering cost as inflation and the cost of living spiral out of control. 

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chrisonabike replied to stomec | 2 years ago
2 likes

Yeah - can't believe Priti didn't suggest sending them to the Donbass?  We get on well with Ukraine and it's a stable democratic country.  Or Turkmenistan - they're keen on the rule of law there.

I don't understand this lot in Parliament.  Can't they just do what normally happens in a domestic crisis and start demonising foreigners and then get embroiled in a war a long way away?

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hawkinspeter replied to stomec | 2 years ago
2 likes

stomec wrote:

And when the government further tries to distract from the situation by promoting an inhuman plan to deport traumatised asylum seekers to a county which a few months ago the same government was criticising for human rights abuses. At an eye watering cost as inflation and the cost of living spiral out of control. 

I'm pretty sure that's illegal too

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Lamb Henry | 6 years ago
1 like

Trying out a new cafe, and receiving a meagre portion of beans on toast.

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LastBoyScout | 6 years ago
1 like
  • The rider you've been chasing down for a while turning off your route just before you get close enough to pass them.
  • You're out enjoying a solo ride, glance back and there's a complete stranger sat 3" from your back wheel.
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McHackety | 6 years ago
2 likes

You cycle past someone, and then you hear the frantic gear change behind you. Before you know it, their racing you.

Please...after you.

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michophull | 6 years ago
7 likes

Families walking four abreast with a dog on a long lead on cycleways.

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