We’ve shown you a range of cycling related gifts for the speedy, gadget obsessed, urban, female and kiddie cyclists and a selection from the road.cc shop. Now It's my turn to offer a cavalcade of inspired items/useless, overpriced trinkets (delete as you see fit) for the awkward, fussy and discriminating cyclist in your life - presents that should provoke the least amount of tutting on the day.
Sidi Vanity Overshoes 20€
Officially called the Sidi Wire Lycra Overshoe these were my most favouritest thing at Eurobike this year. Know a very expensive Sidi wearer that doesn’t go out in the damp in case their shoes get dirty? Buy them these. Ashamed to go riding with that friend with the Aldi special shoes? Get them a pair of these and your café cred will be assured. These aren’t going to be officially available in the UK so you’ll really show how much you love someone by hunting a pair down.
Handmade Campagnolo Key Ring £10.00
These are custom handmade keyrings hewn from new and authentic Campagnolo parts, looks likes the top of a toe-clip to us. Neat.
Donkey Label White and Neon Socks £8.50
Neon is achingly on trend right now (unlike the phrase 'on trend' - ed), with fluoro yellow appearing all over gloves and over-socks and as zingy highlights on clothing and frames. If you’re not quite ready for the full on Eighties neon revival dip in subtly with these Donkey Label socks. Made of Poly-Pro it’s a flat-knit ultra-lightweight crew sock that provides superior durability, insulation, and moisture management. They come in Sock Rules white but with a delicate hi-viz yellow stripe up the back. Visible and stylish. Also, socks and Christmas.
“Every Day Is New” T-Shirt £25.00
There’s not a week goes by without another t-shirt company popping up making a bunch of cycling related t-shirts lazily regurgitating the same words and graphic solutions as the t-shirt company that popped up the week before. Who’d have thought I’d ever complain about the glut of cycle-related produce. Hey-ho. Anyway, Rebecca Kaye is an actual illustrator and printmaker based in Edinburgh who doesn’t just do bike stuff, but she does do this nice t-shirt that subtly says ‘Cycling’ without being overtly ‘Cyclist’. Made from 100% Organic ring spun cotton, in a slim fit to flatter your exquisitely honed physique.
Age and Treachery Print £25/£35
One of a series of four posters celebrating the words of wisdom from the greats of cycling. Other posters feature quotes from Bernard Hinault, Greg Lemond and Hennie Kuiper but this one comes from Fausto Coppi, and its sentiment is something that will appeal to cyclists of a certain age. Twice winner of the Tour de France and five-time winner of the Giro d'Italia, Coppi was handy on a bike, but he was also a master of cycling's dark arts, never more succinctly put than in this devious quote. The design pays homage to the classic Bianchi jersey Coppi wore in his heyday. This is a Giclee print, with archival ink on very nice 300gsm art paper. Sold unframed at £25 for an A3 print, £35 for A2.
Retro Team Espresso Set £40.00
Cycling and coffee is A Thing isn’t it? Indulge in the pre-ride ritual with these 4 cups that feature the classic cycling teams of Molteni, Brooklyn, Renault and La Vie Claire. Each cup is properly thick-walled (warm before using, I’ve told you that before) and holds about 80ml/3oz, that’s enough for a double espresso or small macchiato, measuring around 6cm in height, with each saucer 10cm in diameter. Each cup is hand decorated and baked in a kiln so finish is stunning high gloss, and completely dishwasher safe.
Drink Tea, Ride Bikes - Bike Shop Brew £5.99
If it’s not coffee then it’s tea when you’re a cyclist. Or both. Coffee before, tea after, and maybe during, we’ll work out the rules later, in the meantime this Bike Shop Brew is a classic English Breakfast Tea blended specifically for cyclists. Also suitable for thirsty bike shop staff. It’s not quite proper tea because it comes as tea bags, but remember - proper tea is theft.
Silicone Tidds £3.99
For the person that wants to shave every piece of weight from their bike, or wants it to look pretty, Silicone Tidds. Taking the place of unused bottle cage bolts they weigh a mere 0.25g each, that’s 90% less than a redundant steel bolt and they look dapper. In black, white or pink.
Herfie Road Chalk £10
There’s some big cycling event or other happening in the UK in 2014. You may have heard. Make sure you don’t fall foul of some official by trying to spray-paint your favourite rider’s name on that climb with these wash away road chalks. Chunkily sized so you don’t spend all morning colouring in they come in yellow, green and red. Supplied in a jersey-pocket sized tube each one includes a 16 page, A7 booklet filled with quotes from the peloton to read whilst you wait.
Cinelli Clothes Pegs 6.00 €
Don’t just peg out your socks and bibs on the line with any old clothes pegs, as a dyed-in-the-wool cyclist you need these Cinelli branded ones. Obviously. For your money you get a pack of 10 branded wooden clothes-pegs
for laundry day. Cinelli also suggest they’re perfect to use as a trouser clip just like Grandpa used to do. Not so sure on that.
Cav Vinyl Figure £40.00
Following on from the success of the Eddy Merckx figure designer Richard Mitchelson has got his crayons out to design this Mark Cavendish figurine. Don’t call it a doll. Cav is in his British National Champion's jersey and wearing a set of his Oakley Radarlock sunglasses, which are removable. You’ll have probably lost them by Boxing Day.
Magnetic Reflectors £6.00
Being seen is all the rage these days, but the more discerning cyclist shuns the hi-viz vest and rash of lights to remain visible. These small reflectors from Bookman are discreet enough to go unnoticed in daylight yet add an extra degree of safety at night. As they’re magnetic they’ll only work on a steel frame, but everyone knows the discerning cyclist only rides a bicycle fabricated from such material.
XON Swarovski Crystal Presta Valve Caps £6.00(ish)
The need for valve caps has been the subject of much heated discussion among the cognoscenti, but if you absolutely must use them then please make sure they cut the mustard. These valve caps from XON come in anodized black, silver, red, blue or gold alloy with a elegant Swarovski Crystal on the tip. Treat the princess in your life.
Buy it now on ebay.
5th Floor Epic Patch and Strava Stickers £4.50/£3.50
Want to let the cyclist in your life know how awesome you think they are? Simply gift them one of these patches or stickers. Gushing with pride over how they managed a fast bronze on that 100km sportive? Sew an “Epic” patch onto the bum of their Rapha shorts, they’ll like that. Unable to control your sexual desires when they come home bragging about how they reclaimed their KOM on the hill up past Asda? Slap a “Strava Or It Didn’t Happen” sticker on their top-tube. It’s the Christmas gift that shows just how damn proud you are of your little poppet.
Outline Works Bull Bike Holder. £79/£99.
Some would say this is the perfect way to get your grubby bicycle out of the way, others would say it’s the perfect way to keep your pride and joy away from the scuffs and knocks of children and vacuum-cleaners. Either way the Outline Works bike holder is a lot more elegant than two bits of bent metal and will look nice even without your bike in it. Made in the UK from solid steel it’s covered in a soft touch plastic or fur coating in a variety of colours that won’t damage your precious.
Jo Burt has spent the majority of his life riding bikes, drawing bikes and writing about bikes. When he's not scribbling pictures for the whole gamut of cycling media he writes words about them for road.cc and when he's not doing either of those he's pedaling. Then in whatever spare minutes there are in between he's agonizing over getting his socks, cycling cap and bar-tape to coordinate just so. And is quietly disappointed that yours don't He rides and races road bikes a bit, cyclo-cross bikes a lot and mountainbikes a fair bit too. Would rather be up a mountain.