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Karmarama limerick compo: the shortlist!

Which is your favourite? Vote! VOTE!

Well the judges have pored over you entries (thanks very much for being so creative, and also rude, and funny) and narrowed the Karmarama limerick competition to a last eight. The quarter finals, if you you like. Except there won't be semi-finals or anything, just this.

Easy to vote: just comment below with the number of your favourite. One vote per user. We'll count them at tiffin time and the winner gets some socks. Deal? Deal.

Limerick 1

There once were some Nu Meeja hacks

Who equated dead cyclists with twats

But with failure to charm

They prevented no harm

And they mostly got up people's backs

Limerick 2

A half-witted latter-day Barley

Hatched an ad campaign wrecked up on Charlie

"Single-speed's SO last week

Now it's all retro chic

You should check out my 70s Raaaaleigh"

Limerick 3

You don't need those Uzis and Colts

You murderous van-driving dolts!

Run over a bike!

As hard as you like!
'
Cos it's always the cyclist's fault

Limerick 4

When idiots do their campaigning

They dent the compassion remaining

Sensationalist vulture

This heartless blame culture

But all their good karma is waning.

Limerick 5

There was an ad agency called Karma-something or other

Who appear to be a bunch of knobs

I'm not very good at limericks

How many lines are there meant to be?

Ah, 5 apparently, thanks Google.

Limerick 6

An adman from trendy Shoreditch

Came up with the following pitch:

'It's the riders, we'll claim,

Who are mostly to blame

When they're hurt - because life's just a bitch.'

Limerick 7

In the battle between car and bike,
Karmararma gave invective a hike.
Their position was shameless -
"The car driver is blameless".
Twats? Check the mirror, more like.

Limerick 8

Karmarama decided to try
To help stop our cyclists die
Dreamt up a campaign

Did not engage brain
Said sorry and ate humble pie.

Dave is a founding father of road.cc, having previously worked on Cycling Plus and What Mountain Bike magazines back in the day. He also writes about e-bikes for our sister publication ebiketips. He's won three mountain bike bog snorkelling World Championships, and races at the back of the third cats.

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37 comments

Avatar
TheBigMong | 11 years ago
0 likes

Karmarama's crap
Not deserving a response
But here's a haiku

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Mountainboy | 11 years ago
0 likes

Whoo Hoo!

I'd just like to thank my public.

Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...

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TheBigMong | 11 years ago
0 likes

#5, but without the "legit" limericks for context, it wouldn't be funny.

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Rvizzle | 11 years ago
0 likes

5. it might not be summing up sentiment towards the campaign, but is comedy gold regardless.

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Tony Farrelly | 11 years ago
0 likes

I'm with GKam, Dave left the best limerick off the shortlist.

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dave atkinson | 11 years ago
0 likes

okay, voting's over. i make that

1 and 5: 7 votes each
7: 5 votes
3: 4 votes
2: 3 votes
4: 2 votes
6 and 8: 1 vote each

So that's a pair of socks each to Mr Agreeable and Mountainboy, if i've got it right. get in touch chaps!

Avatar
captain_slog | 11 years ago
0 likes

Number 6. 'Cos I wrote it. (Is that ethical?)

Also, it's the best. Although actually number 2 is quite good.

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mrsminx411 | 11 years ago
0 likes

#5. Made me laugh out loud  4

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kevarino | 11 years ago
0 likes

number 3 for me.

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McTag | 11 years ago
0 likes

Numero uno!
1

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lady_luck | 11 years ago
0 likes

1 then 2 then 5

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roghino | 11 years ago
0 likes

number 7

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Raleigh | 11 years ago
0 likes

3

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talmeym | 11 years ago
0 likes

Number 8.

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SevenHills | 11 years ago
0 likes

It's got to be 5!

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Alan Tullett | 11 years ago
0 likes

2

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MattT53 | 11 years ago
0 likes

I like 3!

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andybnk | 11 years ago
0 likes

7 for me with 5 a close second!

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djb123 | 11 years ago
0 likes

#5

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lows100 | 11 years ago
0 likes

Not on the list, and not even a limerick, but mingmong's effort was my favourite:

mingmong wrote:

Roses are blue
Violets are red
Mix cycling with twattery..
And you'll be dead.

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Edgeley | 11 years ago
0 likes

1. 3
2. 5
3. 1

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Gkam84 | 11 years ago
0 likes

7 for me, but I'm surprised this one was left out

awkward wrote:

Karmarama decided to act,
But neglected to check any fact,
Their humour's a crime,
Their limericks don't rhyme,
They really are a bunch of wankers...

Avatar
MalcolmBinns | 11 years ago
0 likes

#1

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Simon_MacMichael | 11 years ago
0 likes

2 FTW

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rich22222 | 11 years ago
0 likes

Also 7

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Paul99 | 11 years ago
0 likes

4

then 8 in the AV system. They are the only two that actually follow the rules of a limerick (being an irritating pedant...)

Special mention for 5 though.

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theclaw | 11 years ago
0 likes

7

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jova54 | 11 years ago
0 likes

5 for having the courage to do a non-rhyming limerick  4

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Mr Agreeable | 11 years ago
0 likes

5, genius!

I assume the article's author is exempt, but his entry made I larf.

'twas an ad firm designer's ass-hattery
to blame road deaths on just cycle twattery
but he's taken the rap
'cause his rhyming was crap
let's just say that he's no tony slattery

Avatar
pk1234 | 11 years ago
0 likes

#1

If we did AV:
#8 for greatest amount told in least words and runner up for #7

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