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Your chance to hit the big time in piece based on London Mayor's "Knight on a Shining Bicycle" deeds...

If you can ride a bike, carry off with aplomb an impersonation of an Eton and Oxford-educated newspaper editor turned politician, and harbour ambitions to enter the world of showbiz, we may have just spotted the perfect opportunity for you to hit the big time, but you’d better be quick.

Tomorrow, Goldsmiths College, part of the University of London and the alma mater of famous names such as artists Damien Hirst and Bridget Reilly, poet Linton Kwesi Johnson and three quarters of the band Blur – not to mention road.cc editor, Tony – is holding auditions for the role of Mayor of London Boris Johnson in a short play called Knight on a Bike.

The 15-minute long musical, described as “a quirky, romantic comedy” is based on a real-life incident last year in which the mop-topped mayor chased after a gang of girls on his bike after he caught them mugging a female film producer.

The musical has been written by a student on Goldsmiths’ MA course in Musical Theatre, but the role of Boris is presumably proving a hard one to fill, with rehearsals starting on Friday, the day after the audition, and the performance taking place a week tomorrow.

Boris’s lines are based on things he himself has said – a rich vein of comedy gold if ever there was one – and performers “need to be good movers, on the ball” – much like the great man himself, then – “and should have an interest in contributing to the development of this new piece.”

Auditions will be held tomorrow at Goldsmiths College, New Cross, and further information is available from the director, Benet Catty, and while an excess of tousled blond hair is presumably an advantage, we assume that a suitable wig could be found by the props department if required.
 

Born in Scotland, Simon moved to London aged seven and now lives in the Oxfordshire Cotswolds with his miniature schnauzer, Elodie. He fell in love with cycling one Saturday morning in 1994 while living in Italy when Milan-San Remo went past his front door. A daily cycle commuter in London back before riding to work started to boom, he's been news editor at road.cc since 2009. Handily for work, he speaks French and Italian. He doesn't get to ride his Colnago as often as he'd like, and freely admits he's much more adept at cooking than fettling with bikes.