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An old chestnut, I know but... Argh! Why is Carlton Kirby determined to ruin my procycling enjoyment?! The man is everywhere. I cannot understand how he keeps getting work. To listen to his commentary is to hear a man drowning - the guesswork, the misidentifications, the tedious Partridge-esque turns of phrase, the needless shouting that does not inject excitement in the final... The way he 'wings it' reminds me of those psychic charlatans doing 'cold reading'. Anyone else would be preferable. Anyone. There are many other commentators who actually know what they are talking about. His co-commentators often sound embarrassed. I know I am. He makes watching almost unbearable. As each new race starts I pray it won't be him but increasingly often I am disappointed.  20 Sorry for venting but thanks for listening. I couldn't hold it in any more. Hearing his voice in the opening seconds of tonight's Dauphine coverage finally sent me over the edge  14

63 comments

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mr_fox [53 posts] 2 years ago
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it wasnt the best, but at least it wasn't Duffield and his inane waffling garbage-fest of nonsense rambling... #lowvolume

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ricolek [40 posts] 2 years ago
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Does anyone know who commented Dauphiné yesterday on Sky Sports 3? I was watching a pirate stream and the man sounded Australian but I'm no expert on accents so.. It was horrible, like a robot who was filled with short phrases e.g. "Team Sky is the best. Here's Samuel Sanchez. Veilleux on the front."

Kirby sounds like he doesn't care anymore, like it was holiday for him. But I still prefer him over the robot from Sky Sports.

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Super Domestique [1596 posts] 2 years ago
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Not sure if it's the same one (the Australian guy) but I think itv4 used an Australian guy once that had the most monatone voice ever. Made Sean Kelly sound lively!

Oh and I have to mention (again) Declan Quigley. Spolit my Giro at times!

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technojim [33 posts] 2 years ago
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The pirate feed I watched had Matt Keenan, an Aussie on his own with no co-commentator. He's very good at recognising riders and giving you a quick fact about them - so good that's pretty much all he does. It just sounds like a role call and gets boring pretty quickly.

It could be worse, it could be Phil and Paul.

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simon F [1001 posts] 2 years ago
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I'm pretty sure the aussie guy is Matt Keenan. He's better than quigley but his pronunciation lacks something - Velloo, Damusoo, Kenny Isselonde

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Sam1 [220 posts] 2 years ago
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I'd rather listen to Matt Keenan than a number of other commentators, thats for sure. At least he recognises and calls the riders accurately

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AWPeleton [3279 posts] 2 years ago
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It just shows how vastly peoples views vary about the same sport. I like Kirby, dont know why.

Now Mr Smith who was on with him is a different matter. I would gladly pour vinegar in my eyes than listen to him.  20

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cidermart [488 posts] 2 years ago
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stumps wrote:

It just shows how vastly peoples views vary about the same sport. I like Kirby, dont know why.

Now Mr Smith who was on with him is a different matter. I would gladly pour vinegar in my eyes than listen to him.  20

+1

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Kapelmuur [308 posts] 2 years ago
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I quite like Kirby, he sounds like a jovial cove.

It must be difficult to fill 4/5 hours with incisive commentary, especially on the flat stages where we know there will be a breakaway that will be reeled in shortly before the finish and then a sprint that Cav will win.

Anyone listening to Test Match Special a couple of Saturdays ago will have heard an illustration of how difficult commentating can be when the experienced broadcaster and cricket lover Michael Palin made a painful and inept attempt to describe just 1 over.

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bashthebox [751 posts] 2 years ago
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TMS is the essence of how to make hours of not much happening into something that's incredibly fun to listen to. Cycling could learn a lot from it. I know Eurosport's budgets aren't huge, but a few commentators on rotation would be amazing.

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Some Fella [890 posts] 2 years ago
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I just wait for the day David Millar retires and takes up commentary. He may be a cheating posh boy but he was great on the Olympics BBC coverage.

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viveLaPants [94 posts] 2 years ago
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Crosshouses wrote:

I quite like Kirby, he sounds like a jovial cove.

Totally agree, he's a fine soul. Heard him today say "The time is counting down second by second......could it be any other way I hear you ask" -  4

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Leviathan [1888 posts] 2 years ago
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You lot are never happy. Whether it is Sean Kelly for being too Irish, Phil Liggett for not being anti-Armstrong enough or Hugh Porter for being too old.

Rob Hayles might be insightful but his voice is so boring

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chiv30 [986 posts] 2 years ago
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I'll be honest I like Carlton and Brian , it beats listening to Sean Kelly with his monotone and what seems in intent to pronounce people's names how he thinks they should be .....hell even the other half who hates watching the cycling can't stand Sean Kelly  4

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ruffest [10 posts] 2 years ago
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TdF ruined.

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cidermart [488 posts] 2 years ago
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Ha ha ha  19

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FMOAB [261 posts] 2 years ago
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The Eurosport highlights programme yesterday was truly awful, I watched it back to back with the ITV coverage and it failed to convey any aspect of the racing until the finish line

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chrisdstripes [1721 posts] 2 years ago
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I watched it on ITV yesterday - Phil and Paul are sooo terrible. Their failure to recognise/mention Kristoff (olympic bronze medallist) until about the fifth replay after the finish was appalling. Might try Eurosport today - is it Quigley though? That's arguably worse...
Kirby the best of a bad lot for me...

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Super Domestique [1596 posts] 2 years ago
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David Harmon said he'd be back for TdF. Anyone know where he is?

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lc1981 [56 posts] 2 years ago
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Super Domestique wrote:

David Harmon said he'd be back for TdF. Anyone know where he is?

He's not well: https://twitter.com/Lara_Thornton/status/349894796325814274.

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TheHatter [770 posts] 2 years ago
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lc1981 wrote:
Super Domestique wrote:

David Harmon said he'd be back for TdF. Anyone know where he is?

He's not well: https://twitter.com/Lara_Thornton/status/349894796325814274.

I wish him well - I was just about to comment that Dave is my preferred commentator with Carlton coming in second.

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Super Domestique [1596 posts] 2 years ago
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lc1981 wrote:
Super Domestique wrote:

David Harmon said he'd be back for TdF. Anyone know where he is?

He's not well: https://twitter.com/Lara_Thornton/status/349894796325814274.

Thanks for that.

David, if you were to read this, get well soon. You are missed.

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James Warrener [1081 posts] 2 years ago
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Agree 100% on David Harmon. A really good commentator with great knowledge and a gift for the right turn of phrase.

For me Carlton is improving and should be persevered with.

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carlgrz [51 posts] 2 years ago
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Love Harmon but anything is better than that buffoon Phil Liggett on ITV4, except perhaps Hugh Porter who I will never forgive for trying to ruin my enjoyment of the Olympic road race.

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seabass89 [212 posts] 2 years ago
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I like Carlton, much more than the ITV commentators. The ITV commentators talk about 3 things: Sky, Sky, Sky, Sky, Sky, Froome, Froome, Froome, Froome, Froome, Cav, Cav, Cav, Cav.

Carlton just really likes bicycling, and seems to cheer for everyone. Thats true joy in sports and it is a joy to listen to in my opinion.

This is the enthusiasm I like ->
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=3ru3vGR8nck#t=411s

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Metjas [362 posts] 2 years ago
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I miss David Harmon terribly - hope he gets better soon; he must surely wince if he were to watch his replacement Kirby. If Kirby showed at least the required cycling knowledge I'd forgive all his other shortcomings as a commentator.

Another Brit about to win another TdF. We deserve better commentating.

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ruffest [10 posts] 2 years ago
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Vuelta ruined.

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cidermart [488 posts] 2 years ago
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ruffest wrote:

Vuelta ruined.

I was waiting and you didn't disappoint ha ha you may as well end it all  19

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carlgrz [51 posts] 2 years ago
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Carlton "He's not in a happy place" Kirby. I love his commentary but only with the sound turned off.......

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pjay [248 posts] 2 years ago
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He was truly awful today. Breakaway riders are 'breakers' (waves?), climbs are 'testy' (grumpy?) and a seatpost is a stem (wrong end Carlton). And if he tells us why Rodriguez is called Purito one more time...

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