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I Witnessed a novel approach last night in Richmond Park. A guy was riding past a girl, with no hands on the bars, and doing upper body stretches! Sadly for him, the girl on the bike was unimpressed, and totally ignored his display of bike skilfull bike handling.
At this point he noticed us approaching, and sadly decided to put a bit of an effort in to stop us passing and show off his strength. Again he failed miserably.

If you're reading this my friend, please try something new, as the chances of you having sex ever again are very unlikely

10 comments

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farrell [1950 posts] 3 years ago
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What an Amateur!

We all know the way you attract female cyclist is by drawing a knob in chalk on your left thigh. Bum pinch is optional.

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davecochrane [140 posts] 3 years ago
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Nothing says "good girl" like a firm pat on the buttocks...

...or so my Dad tells me.  26

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Gkam84 [9086 posts] 3 years ago
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I find treating them NO different to male cyclists doesn't work, they just think I'm gay.....  13

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Colin Peyresourde [1719 posts] 3 years ago
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Sounds like you're all playing hard to get, but would really like him to call you....
 105

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badkneestom [135 posts] 3 years ago
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Pretty straightforward solution:
1. Remove lycra.
2. Go to passtime no. 2, beer.

Clothes put on between 1 and 2 is advisable.

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Simon_MacMichael [2450 posts] 3 years ago
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"If you're reading this my friend, please try something new, as the chances of you having sex ever again are very unlikely"

That's a bit harsh. Those arm exercises are bound to come in useful...

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Veronique [4 posts] 3 years ago
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The one guy I've seen riding regularly at Richmond Park always surrounded by pretty girls is Nasty Nick from Big Brother first series.

Make of that what you will!

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cidermart [488 posts] 3 years ago
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Pheromone spray: Apply it very liberally, a whole can, and then ignite it, your screams should attract the attention of females. It could also kick in their mothering instinct well that or the smell of cooking bacon as your flesh burns might make them hungry and even the veggies can warm up their lentil soup on you. Good luck with the ladies.  3

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Welsh boy [293 posts] 3 years ago
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A mini pump down the front of your shorts?

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chrisl [51 posts] 3 years ago
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One nice chap challenged me to hop on behind him when overtaking me after Elephant & Castle, which I did (impressively considering it was about 12am, he was pretty nippy, and my bike isn't the poshest) and my rear light promptly fell off as I went over a drain crater, meaning I had to stop and rescue it. I like to think it might have been true love had the roads been a little better...