Ill - Part 2.

by VecchioJo   March 19, 2009  

I don't miss riding a bike.

I do miss it's emotional release though, I miss starting out laden with self-loathing and doubt, pedalling ever stronger through belief and finishing with smug satisfaction, I miss the thoughts, and the lack of them, I miss the joy of my body working well, or even just working horribly badly, and knowing the myriad of distinctions between the two, I miss feeling lungs and muscles, I miss The Hurt, I miss the wind, I miss the seasons on my skin, I miss the dressing-up, I miss the hollow hunger of the last few miles and the ability to eat anything with a need and a passion, I miss getting back home with better mood happy chemicals flooding the brain, I miss the gentle ache and feeling things repair, I miss being asleep before I hit the pillow, or being rocked to sleep by the deep rhythmic thrub of blood, I miss feeling clean, I miss being a tight functioning human being rather than a mess of fleshy parts wrapped in baggy greasy skin.

But I don't miss the riding at all.

4 user comments

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How long has it been since you rode your bike?

Denzil Dexter's picture

posted by Denzil Dexter [140 posts]
19th March 2009 - 10:03

2 Likes

3 weeks since I've ridden properly (pootles in and out of town are ok), but this is the return of whateveritwas that kept me off the bike for 2 months towards the end of the last year so the pressure cooker of desperation has just exploded, compounded by the arrival of warm weather, sunshine and a brace of pre-planned weekends of cycling.

gah.

posted by VecchioJo [768 posts]
19th March 2009 - 20:25

1 Like

I'm not surprised the pressure cooker of desperation has just exploded

Denzil Dexter's picture

posted by Denzil Dexter [140 posts]
19th March 2009 - 21:40

3 Likes

Next weekend in jeopardy then?

mooseman's picture

posted by mooseman [60 posts]
20th March 2009 - 16:44

0 Likes